(2026 Preamble: I wrote a majority of this article almost exactly a year ago having been inspired by Eddie's Humble Purge series. It would've functioned as a video game version of the reading roundups people post. I kinda got stuck writing the last part of it for reasons that will hopefully become self evident, so it was left on the backburner for some time. Looking over it now I found it interesting as a time capsule of a fragment of where I was at back then. So I cleaned it up a little and added what could be construed as “author's commentary”. To differentiate between the old and new bits I will stylize my addendums in the same way as you are seeing this paragraph now.)

In light of Eddie's recent printhouse contribution I've been inspired to take a slightly more structured approach to which games I play. The most notable difference is jotting down my thoughts as soon as I finish one and cataloguing it somewhere. I've been doing this for the last few games I've played recently, and I figured it would also be fitting to write up my thoughts more clearly here for everyone to enjoy. I haven't played these games entirely in this month, but I have finished them all this month.

(Amusingly, while the article in question I was referencing is no longer recent, the current most recent Eddie article, “The Humble Purge Awards”, did also spurn me back to this unfinished article. Having held off on posting this for a while I can kind of write a dialogue with myself from last year. I didn't really end up keeping with the cataloguing habit, though I do still sort of have a backlog thingy floating in my notes. I am not adhering to it as much as I am just jotting things down so I can check them out later.)

Each of these function as sort of mini reviews. As much as I wish I could be as precise and eloquent as Jimmy McGee, I at least hope that they are interesting to read. The last time I did a big list of games type article I got the impression that it gets kinda grating after a while, so I've included links for you to jump to different sections. Feel free to break up reading this into little chunks.

(Something I touch on here that I think I still struggle with here is how I don't really have a lot of confidence in my writing. I compare myself to probably one of the best video game analysts I have ever seen and lament that my work will probably not match his quality. I think there's also an element of shame in the fact that I struggle to write at length on subjects that aren't video games, and my target of comparison here also does generally centre his work around the same topic. However, in his case he executes his ideas so well they often are profound in a way that applies to more than 'just video games'. Even a year later I don't think these feelings about myself have changed very much.)

Jump to section:

• Portal 2
• Portal Stories: Mel
• Felvidek
• Laika: Aged Through Blood
• Venba

Portal 2

You play as Chell, a woman trapped indefinitely inside a deep underground scientific facility known as “Aperture Science”. You're awakened by Wheatley, a stupid, British, spherical robot who presents himself as your only ticket to escape this withering and decaying complex. Armed with a gun that can create portals you might find a way out to your freedom.

One of the all time greats, played most of it through in 2016 but never rolled credits on it for some reason. There are many games I've started but never finished, but I felt as though this one was the worst offender. I'm glad I did get back to it though because despite over a decade of technological and artistic advancements in the games industry there still isn't anything quite like it.

To analyze each aspect of this game on its own would be doing a disservice. While each pillar of this game supports this experience very strongly, I truly believe the whole is greater than the sum of its parts. While I could talk at length about each part, the point that should not go overlooked is the writing. It's rare that a game has an actually engaging cast of characters, but it's clear that Valve stands head and shoulders above the competition in terms of writing dialogue that you actually want to listen to. They knew this very well, as more often than not your reward for completing a puzzle is getting to listen to the characters react either to you or the situation at hand. These exaggerated characters in this ridiculous story is truly a treat, and becomes the ribbon that ties every aspect of this game into a nice present.

🌔🌔🌔🌔🌔

(I don't think I have much more I want to add to many of these game reviews themselves. I haven't played any of these games again so the only thing that might change is just what I remember about them one year later. It's interesting that the first game on this list connects to the idea of returning to unfinished business. The parallel here is purely coincidental but kind of poetic the way that lined up.)

Portal Stories: Mel

As great as Portal 2 was, taking a massive break halfway into the game only to finish it years later left me wanting more. Not to fear however, as Portal 2 is also known for its fully featured community created mods which often act as substitute campaigns. With new sets of levels, sometimes new mechanics, new voice acted characters, and the best of them wrap it all in an original story to boot. All of this (usually) available at the price of free! The biggest challenge mods like these would face however is a comparison to the game they derive themselves from, can a mod truly match or surpass the base Portal 2 experience?

Not quite but it is shockingly close. As a community made mod available for free I will lightly acknowledge its shortcomings and celebrate its achievements. The art and music was very good, the portal gun redesign really sets it apart as its own experience while still maintaining the visual language cultivated in the original game, I especially like the little paperclip on one of the prongs.

I also quite enjoyed the levels. That being said, I came out of this mod with a much greater appreciation of Valve's game development philosophy of extremely thorough playtesting. The level of challenge was an upward slope, which in theory is what you want but in practice it becomes pretty grueling towards the end as you do several hard puzzles in succession. There was also a spot early on where you would get softlocked if you messed a puzzle up which was quite frustrating.

The story and voice acting was fine enough. I can't really blame them for not matching Valve's excellent writing team but credit where credit is due, I didn't hate it. I actually quite liked the new antagonist and especially the final boss fight against it. It was quite creative and was definitely more fun than Portal 1's boss fight.

Despite a couple rough patches, I still found myself repeatedly coming back to this mod, which is definitely an indication of its quality. Fundamentally it filled the exact niche I wanted it to, a little more Portal 2 for me to enjoy.

⚛️⚛️⚛️

(What's intriguing here is the way that Portal Mel stacks up against Portal 2 kinda mirrors how I stack up against my own standards in terms of writing. I acknowledge the shortcomings of the mod, but I also note that it isn't realistic to expect it to be a real competitor given the difference between all of Valve software, and a couple modders. I don't really show myself that same level of consideration it seems...)

Felvidek

You play as Pavol, an alcoholic knight in 15th Century Slovakia. Your drunk ass is dragged around by your local Catholic priest Matej as you both are tasked by the local lord to make sure the region is free from Ottoman presence. Hopefully on the way you find your wife who walked off at some point because you were drinking too much.

I often recommend games to another printhouse reader, some of them have managed to make their way to his personal favourites. It's not often that this goes the other way, but if any game deserves to be highlighted it's this one.

I'm not typically a fan of JRPGs, but I'm not completely averse to the genre. A couple of years ago I stumbled on a quirky, short little game called Hylics with a very unique presentation. While Felvidek bears many surface level similarities to Hylics, it doesn't feel like a hollow clone in the slightest. Visually the game does a lot with a little, the limited colour palette, chunky pixels and large sprites giving it this class textbook photocopy vibe. As well as the sporadic low poly cutscene really helps set the unique visual style that this game has.

Part of my enjoyment with the game definitely comes from its intentional deviations from what might be considered the “standard JRPG formula”. Felvidek does away with the typical experience grind found in most RPGs. Your equipment is what determines your strength, and there are only a handful of upgrades. This keeps the game moving through the entire runtime which was very enjoyable. Also unlike many JRPGs which frequently last for tens, if not hundreds of hours, Felvidek is only about 4 hours long. This refreshing brevity is great for getting a nice sampling of the experience without overstaying its welcome.

(I feel the need to note that the concept of 'gear based progression' is not particularly rare in RPGs. It certainly contributes to the short runtime of the game, but it isn't necessarily true to say this is the only game that does this. I am just not very familiar with the genre.)

The biggest strength of this game however is its tone. The world of Felvidek is rather bleak, but the acknowledgement of this is placid. The characters face horrors with a grim smile and a jovial joke, because what else is one to do when faced with things beyond their comprehension? Beneath the Shakespearian prose is a genuinely very funny game that speaks of tragedy and absurdity in the same breath. The scene that best illustrates this is when an otherworldly creature crawls in through Pavol's bedroom window, stirring him from his drunken slumber. His immediate response to seeing this monstrous thing standing over him... is to wordlessly throw the closest empty bottle he has at its head.

🌞🌞🌞🌞🌞

(Looking back on this now I think the parts of this game that still stick with me are the slivers of it that references parts of my heritage. There's one joke about how Orthodox priests are able to have wives and children, which I found funny as a Coptic Orthodox christian. There's another running joke about this 'qahwa' craze tearing through this little eastern European land. Something which I immediately clocked in as the Arabic word for 'coffee'. I'll talk more about this at the end, but I have some deep regrets about not tuning into this part of my life more over the last year.)

Laika: Aged Through Blood

(TW: Violence towards children)

You play as Laika, a coyote mother who roams the sandy wastelands on her bone motorcycle and a revolver at her side. When your daughter's best friend, Poochie, is brutally murdered and crucified by the encroaching Bird army, his father, Jakob embarks on a quest for vengeance in retribution for the death of his son. You chase after him because he took your revolver to do it. So begins the spiral of blood and pain as the increasingly militant birds attempt to wipe out you and your tiny band of mammalian survivors.

What first grabbed my attention about this game was its very slick presentation. The world of Laika is beautifully rendered in this dusty yet simultaneously vibrant art style. The lovingly hand-drawn vistas and fully animated characters all come together to form a visual repertoire that is both distinct and very well executed. Interspersed throughout the game are also brief fully animated cutscenes which serve to punctuate specific moments, typically at the end of boss fights. It's clear there has been a lot of thought and care put into the look of this game, and it shows, the aesthetic identity of this game is proudly announced to your eyes, and sticks in my brain.

One I got past the eye candy, the second most prominent aspect of this game is clear. Laika bills itself as a “motorvania” and that's a fairly accurate summarization of the gameplay. When watching trailers of this game I was brought back to playing Trials Evolution on my Xbox 360. What Laika does differently however, is lessen the physics sandbox aspect of a 2d motorbike game and add in a seasoning of twitch reaction gameplay by making it a shooter. The momentum needed to clear jumps coupled with the backflip mechanic that reloads your weapons creates a sandbox where these two disparate mechanics flow beautifully together.

That being said while the game certainly has its “motor” it is somewhat lacking in the “vania”. One would expect a large world to explore gated by progression checks that you would come back later to with enhanced mobility. A typical metroidvania will present walls you can't climb up, or gaps you can't jump across prompting you to come back later when you are stronger and see what you missed. While Laika does do this, there's really only two major gates you are presented with. You pass the first one fairly early in the game, and you pass the second one right before the end. So for roughly 80% of your time with it, you are getting around the same as you were before. Riding around on your motorbike is very enjoyable, so this isn't really the biggest knock against the experience. Though, it does feel like there's something missing when you're given a grappling hook and the only thing you ever use it for is to do a sidequest.

The elements of Laika range from exceptional to middling, but the single biggest detriment I can point to is the boss fights. Laika's combat is highly lethal for the most part, all regular enemies die in one hit, as does Laika herself. That being said, it is only natural for a big hulking enemy to not die in one shot from a pistol. However, these fights are also drawn out further with phases where you can't hit the boss at all. Sometimes this is in the form of a driving section, sometimes it's in the form of you just standing there waiting for the boss to show up again for you to attack them. These things on their own are fine, but in conjunction with the fact that one mistake always sends you back to the very beginning of the fight culminates into a battle that does not test your capabilities in any way other than your patience. I feel like on some level this was known to the developers because the very final boss fight of the game was my favourite largely because its one continuous, fluid battle.

Aside from my nitpicks, the game is really quite good. The soundtrack is another major highlight. The acoustic soundscape and soft vocals contribute heavily to the feeling of this melancholic wasteland. I have caught myself on several occasions humming the vocals from certain tracks like “Trust Them” and “My Destiny”. I've never heard of the artist before but Beícoli absolutely nailed it. I also quite liked the integration of the artist into the game world itself lends a more diegetic tone to the music in the game. Especially how you collect cassette tapes to expand the soundtrack as you play the game. In fact the in-world character that the artist embodies becomes a major thematic plot point in the story of the game.

Speaking of plot, the story of this game was quite shocking, in multiple interpretations of that word. For a game that revolves around cute anthropomorphic characters I was really caught off guard by how grim the story is. Your efforts consistently prove to be futile, and the war that you fight as a single soldier is only very temporarily successful. Moreover, the game also just has really shocking moments. The odd sidequest or story beat has the possibility of just being genuinely awful, but what is one to expect when the game starts the way it did.

I didn't expect to have said as much as I did about this game, but something like this prompts you to recall it in its entirety. I respect the developer's commitment to their artistic vision, but such specialization leaves it with more of a niche appeal. The game definitely isn't for everyone, but I can certainly say that there is nothing else like it.

🦴🦴🦴🦴

(One of my main nitpicks about Laika is that despite being a game where you drive a motorbike, your character's mobility doesn't shift from where it starts for a majority of your playtime. I kinda feel that stagnation in me, I am not really a goal oriented person, but it's hard to shake the feeling that I myself haven't shifted that far from last year. Stuck having done an extra year of a Master's degree. Stuck in Kingston. Stuck having failed to achieve one of the main goals I set for myself at the beginning...)

Venba

You play as Venba, a Tamil woman who moves to Toronto in an attempt to start a new life there with her husband. Follow along as she faces the challenges of immigrating to an unfamiliar place, raises a child and most of all, cooks dinner for her family every night.

Never before have I had a game so perfectly mirror back aspects of my life that even I wasn't fully aware of. While I have never been embarrassed to be Egyptian, I can certainly say that I've had to try and balance wanting to fit in versus connecting to my own culture. The biggest barriers I've faced in trying to find this balance, is my lack of ability to speak my mother tongue. It's no secret that Arabic is a very challenging language to learn, and I've always held onto a slight frustration with my parents for not raising me with the language. The beauty of this game is that you take the perspective from the mother in this dynamic, and it's given me a lot of sympathy for my own parents in the dilemmas that they faced.

Food is a wordless language, which allows it to be expressed and understood universally. Eating a meal from my heritage is like having a conversation with my ancestors. I take great delight in being afforded this opportunity where I otherwise fail with spoken words. I've clung to it as the strongest means of interfacing with my roots. Venba is a cooking game, but in the way that food forges interpersonal connections with friends and family.

(This was all I had written about Venba, not because I didn't have more to say but because I had a lot of difficulty trying to explain the deeply resonating experience of playing this game as a second generation immigrant living in Canada. I was also doubting if anything I would've said would've made sense from an outsider's perspective. Having finished the game I was left with an overwhelming need to attempt to properly connect to my culture and ancestry by trying to mend the bridge that was never properly built in the first place, learning the Arabic language. It was going to be my new year's resolution)

(I have never done a new year's resolution before, and as you might have gathered, it was not very successful. This, in and of itself, isn't particularly bad, but there is another major event that especially twists this knife in me. In my life I never got to meet my grandfathers, they passed before I had the chance. My only remaining grandparents have been my two grandmothers. They are lovely people, but I have always struggled connecting with them primarily due to the language barrier. As a result, I was never particularly close to them. So a secret wish of mine in this new year's resolution I set for myself was to leverage that newfound knowledge to get to know them a little better.)

(They both passed this year, one not long after the other...)

(...)

(I write this in the dwindling hours of Coptic Orthodox Christmas, another fun quirk of my background I hold dear. This was the first one my family has had without them around. I don't really miss them as much as I feel like I should. The unrealized potential of what my bonds to them could have been had I learned Arabic stings more than the actual bonds that I lost. That makes me feel kinda shitty, like I don't actually care for them or something...? I don't know, it's weird.)

(Am I even gonna post this? Or will this addendum be unfinished just like so much of this past year. This article, left to fester in my obsidian notes. Perhaps it will grow like a tumour as I add more to it year on year. Why write this flavoured up image of myself and post it for my friends anyways?? Why do anything at all???)

(Like... it's not like they couldn't speak any English, one of them was decently fluent in it. Is it really worth it to play up that aspect for the sake of dramatics, even if it isn't fully true? )

(I want to be better about finishing things, and maybe that starts here with this weird ass, slightly fictional, self indulgent article...)

(I still want to learn Arabic, if for no other reason than to strengthen the bonds I have with the people who share my culture. But I will have to learn to spend the rest of my life with the regret that I didn't do it soon enough to talk to my grandmothers in our mother tongue. So I will cherish the moments that I was fortunate to get, the broken english conversations, the odd secret 20 dollar bill unbeknownst to my parents and most importantly the delicious meals we got to share.)

The year is 200X. Me and my best bud were hanging out at a kids' entertainment area in the mall. Equipped with an indoor jungle gym, a tiny zip line, a little fake treehouse I used to chill and drink orange fanta in, probably a ball pit, and plenty of other things that could keep a kid occupied for hours while their parents go shopping. This is not our first time here, and as we waltz onto familiar ground my friend goes ahead of me and I agree to meet up with him later. An hour passes... I am nowhere to be found. My friend, concerned by my disappearance, goes searching. At the computer section, he finds me, glued to my screen. I'm enthralled by this game that lets you play as Kirby and beat up Mario and other Nintendo characters that I did not recognize. I had to be proverbially dragged away from the computer so we could hang out like normal kids.

Much later in life did I learn that this game was Super Smash Bros. for the Nintendo 64.

The year is 2008, my brothers invite some friends over to play on our Nintendo Wii. They bring this game I've never heard of before, apparently it just came out. I got to play as Kirby and beat up Mario and Link and some more characters I did not recognize. I was addicted, and fortunately, we decided to get the game for ourselves too. I spent many many hours appreciating every nook and cranny of that game, even though I sucked at it.

This game was Super Smash Bros Brawl for the Nintendo Wii.

The year is 2012, my middle brother installs this mod for Brawl on our Wii. He says it's to make the game more balanced. I didn't really get it but it looked cool with the purple menus. I think I am better at this game than I was before, but I still consistently lose to my brother when we fight each other. Despite this I am enthralled, plus it has Mewtwo now!!

This was Project M.

The year is 2014. I've somehow stumbled upon a livestream of a Super Smash Bros. tournament. Names get thrown around I don't recognize. Two players approach the camera and begin playing. I have played Project M before but I've never seen it being played like this. The skill on display by these players was nothing short of bewildering. Even though I didn't understand what was going on half the time I couldn't help but watch the spectacle.

This was Apex 2014.

The year is 2015. I now own a 3ds with Smash 4 on it, I am going to put in 200 hours just fighting the level 9 CPU. From Apex I found another tournament, the biggest fighting game tournament in the world. The grand stage for Smash Bros. but also many other more traditional fighting games. I see the final frontier of fighting games around the world, and I am amazed. I was familiar with the genre. I have been exposed to Street Fighter Ex plus Alpha, Street Fighter 4, and Marvel vs Capcom 3 on our home consoles by now. However, to me, these games were impenetrably complicated, so I just stuck to smash. “I could never learn those games,” I thought to myself.

That tournament... was EVO.

The year is 2016. I continue to play Smash 4 and dabble in Smash Bros. Melee. I found a website that lets me play Melee online, but I live in the UAE so games are scarce. Watching Evo becomes a yearly ritual. I wake up at 2 am to catch the Smash grand finals. It's lonely, I silently cheer at my computer desk while my family sleeps. I move back to Canada. While browsing the Smash Bros. forums I find a tournament being held in Kingston. I enter the tournament (won one tho btw) and begin entering weekly tournaments held at Queen's. They have other fighting games there too.

“I could never learn those games, but they look really cool,” I think to myself.

The year is 2017. I play mainly Melee now. I continue to attend the Queen's weeklies. I watch analysis videos on fighting games. They look awesome. I pick up another game called Rivals of Aether, it's a lot like Melee, it's pretty fun. I continue to watch Evo. At this point I try to watch all the games being played at Evo, I find them all very engaging.

“I wish I could play those games, but I have nobody to learn it with,” I think to myself.

The year is 2018. I enter University. I managed to convince my floormate to try and learn Dragon Ball FighterZ with me. We played a few games, it didn't stick. I prioritize doing my schoolwork and socializing with my new friends, so I don't have time to enter the weeklies anymore.

Years pass... I continue to watch Evo from the sidelines and dabble in Melee.

I started fencing too, my first thought is how similar it is to fighting games.

The year is 2024. I have made many friends from my university days. I could even talk to some of them about fighting games. One of them in particular is heavily invested in Street Fighter 3: 3rd Strike. This year, Evo announces 3rd Strike as part of its main lineup, a once in a lifetime opportunity. He says he will go no matter what, and a group of us decide to join him. I have been watching for years now, what better chance to go than now? Since we're going, why not enter the tournament too? The unrealized dream of playing a fighting game begins to materialize in front of my very eyes. We begin training, we all suck equally.

Months pass, we travel to New York to compete in a smaller tournament. We meet our friend's mentor, who remarks that we have come far, I'm flattered. The next day we fight, and I win a game! We learn many things, and witness levels of skill we could never imagine. We talk to some of the people, one of them tells us “It's good to have a rival”. I agree.

We return home, that phrase echoing in my mind, and continue training. Every inch I gain over my rival is returned twofold. A silent arms race between two opponents. The day of competition looms over us all. With our weapons stockpiled and our blades sharp, we embark on the journey to the world stage.

Then our flight got canceled. That dream, once so clear now disintegrating away like sand through my fingers. We rebook our flights, but they are too late for us to compete. I try not to cry, I don't know if I succeeded.

I wake at 3 am, beaten and broken by the emotional lashes of the previous 12 hours. I can't sleep, so I look for a solution. There is a flight that will take me there on time, at a pretty penny. I reevaluate some financial decisions and draw out the money necessary to make it, I can't let it end here.

Despite it all, I make it, and enter the tournament. I defeat my first opponent, and feel confident. Then I lose to the second. “All that money just to do the same as NYC?” I fear. I cannot let it end here. I approach my third opponent, one more loss and it's lights out. I defeat him. “At least it will be an improvement” I tell myself. Then I beat my next opponent, and the next. My blade is sharp, forged in the flames of a 6 month rivalry. I approach my next opponent, and find his claws sharper...

To the world, I may have lost. But to myself, I have won. Not the whole tournament, but my dream. All these years of imagining what it's like, of wishing to be at Evo myself, of hoping to break the barrier that faced me every other time I tried. There I was, at Evo, having beaten 4 other people, in an actual real fighting game that is not Smash.

I stand at the ridge of this cold mountain and look at the view. My shoes dusty with the many steps of my journey. The icy peak barely visible through the clouds, but the view at this height is unlike anything I thought it would be. The vast lush valley sits below me and I admire how far I have come. I could continue to climb, and maybe I will, but those extra steps will be accompanied by the unending thought. “I did it...

...I've finally played a fighting game.”

For some time now I've been grappling with the idea that, despite the fact that while many of the things I enjoy are created by large groups of people, the final result is typically attributed to one single person. I'm certainly not the first person to notice this, but this dilemma has been brought to the forefront of my mind after watching this brief presentation in which each person's contribution to a game is described in detail. That in conjunction with watching an extremely long investigation into the theft of Disco Elysium from its original creators (a term much more ambiguous than it first seems), as well as another video essay on the real creator of the Roblox “oof” sound. These three things in recent succession crystallized this issue in a way that provokes confrontation.

Despite subconsciously knowing this phenomenon to be true, it didn't stop me from associating names with works as if they were the singular force behind their existence. Cases such as: Hidetaka Miyazaki – Creator of Dark Souls, Masahiro Sakurai – Creator of Smash Bros, Todd Howard – Creator of Skyrim, John Romero and John Carmack – Creators of Doom(1993). Even the indie beloved Undertale is not the sole creation of Toby Fox but also includes significant art contributions by Temmie Chang. In fact, this iconic quote from IGN sums up the problem better than I ever could:

“There's a tendency among the press to attribute the creation of a game to a single person,” says Warren Spector, creator of Thief and Deus Ex.

— IGN Staff

In a tasteful irony, not even that quote is properly accredited, but instead is attributed to “IGN Staff”. Only after scrolling to the bottom of the article would one find the true author of those words, Steve Butts (who, as an aside as I was looking into this, was fired from IGN for sexual harassment, yayyyyyyyyy).

I illustrate this not to disregard the likely significant contributions these people had on their respective works, but rather to highlight that the perception is skewed significantly in favor of the individual as opposed to the collective. Indeed, single-person projects do exist, the iconic indie farming game, Stardew Valley, serves as an example of just that (ignoring ports and later updates).

I know a certain reader of the printhouse dislikes when issues are bought up and not definitively solved in the same piece, so what can be done about this problem? The answer might lie in a personal favourite first-person shooter of mine, ULTRAKILL.

Pictured above is the ULTRAKILL's credits section, also known as the “Hall of Shame”. It is an in-game virtual museum depicting every person who has contributed to the game in some capacity. Almost every contributor has a little virtual plush/portrait depicting them or their avatar and a plaque that states their name and role. Should the player be interested to know more about a member of the team, they have the option to pick up a little book in front of them and read a brief blurb further detailing their work on the game.

This little museum is leaps and bounds ahead of any credits roll as far as recognition goes and has done more to transition my perception of the game from a “one-person project” to a larger effort from many people. While it would be easy to simply point at this example and say “Why doesn't everyone do this?” that'd be too naïve even for me, because it would have to conveniently ignore one small issue with this whole endeavor.

Effort. The entire sphere of accreditation takes a consistent effort across the board. Effort to recognize, effort to document, and effort to present. A part of me feels like this is a weak excuse, but I also recognize that to make a video game (or anything really) takes a mountain of effort already. For a game like ULTRAKILL, a museum of virtual opulence may be difficult, but still feasible given the size of the team. On the other hand, for a AAA game with an ever-swelling number of team members, such an idea would be laughable. In fact, the credits roll for Street Fighter 6 is a staggering twelve minutes long.

Despite this complication, some games persevere regardless. Even though Undertale has garnered a reputation as a one-man project, the credits at the end of the game clearly show who worked on the game. Undertale goes as far as to take all the Kickstarter backer names and turn it into a bullet hell minigame. Smash Bros turns the credits roll into an on-rails shooting segment. This may not inform you about what each person did the way ULTRAKILL does, but you do recognize that each of these names holds a notable weight in the final result.

I wasn't really sure how to end an article like this, but I came to the conclusion that what all these 987 words are trying to say is that people make things. Therefore, it'd be best to try and appreciate that very fact. So I sent a message to one of the artists for ULTRAKILL, thanking them for their work on the game. If there's an artistic work that resonates with you for whatever reason, maybe try to reach out to someone who worked on it and thank them too.

In an effort to bolster my printhouse contributions, this blog will serve as something less structured and analytical than Ghost Notes. Like when a YouTuber makes a second channel to throw their garbage on. With that in mind, I thought it might be interesting to, in no particular order, explore some of the many game and game related projects I've kept a keen eye on. In particular, ones that feel as though they have been in progress for an especially lengthy amount of time. Alongside each entry will be a rough estimation of how long I've been waiting for each project. Enjoy!

Momentum Mod –

Waiting time: At least 3 years

This project in particular was probably the main inspiration for this article. My typical approach when it comes to extremely long-term projects I am interested in is... to forget about them. Only when I remember they exist do I check in to see their respective status. But for whatever reason I cannot seem to keep this thing out of my head for more than a month at a time.

“Source” is the game engine primarily used by Valve Software, creators of renowned games such as Counter-Strike: Global Offensive, Team Fortress 2, and Portal. A noteworthy quirk of its physics allows you to slide along sharp slopes by strafing into them. This minor detail has snowballed into an entire community of creators who make maps designed to exploit this phenomenon in order to make a giant course for you to slip and slide around. These maps have been dubbed “surf maps”.

The issue is that to play these surf maps you need to open them through a game like CS:GO, then join a community server hosting one of these maps, or download the map yourself and configure the physics settings of your game to accommodate it. While not necessarily the most cumbersome process, it is inconvenient enough for me to avoid doing it in favor of something else.

This is where the Momentum Mod comes in. As a standalone client, it'll become trivially easy to open up the game and start sliding around to my heart's content. It is that exact ideal that I pine so intently for. Unfortunately, as is common for its breed, it is a mod that is supported by a small but dedicated group of developers, who work on it in their free time. So any estimation of its day of completion is a fruitless endeavor.

Hollow Knight: Silksong –

Waiting time: At least 2 years

It's no secret that I have a particular fondness for Hollow Knight. The developers at Team Cherry have taken the levelheaded approach to the hype by keeping the community blind to their progress on its highly anticipated sequel. What's more amusing is seeing the feral reactions from the fans whenever even the most minor of informational scraps are thrown in their general direction regarding the game or its release date.

Like many others I found Hollow Knight to be a beautiful game in all aspects. Its visuals invoke rich atmospheres of varied landscapes. Its soundtrack, often haunting, yet whimsical. Its gameplay, potentially very challenging but with an equal sense of reward when mastered. Judging by what previews we do have, Silksong exhibits the same excellent attention to detail as its predecessor.

I may be cursing myself to more years of waiting by saying this, but I actually think this one might release soon. Despite their tepid desire to indicate any potential release date for the game, they did allow Xbox to post on their Twitter that Silksong, among many other games, will be “playable over the next 12 months”.

So you’re telling me Silksong is out within the next 12 months

— That guy (@1xandermander) June 12, 2022

That's exactly what we said.

— Xbox (@Xbox) June 12, 2022

Assuming no delays, that puts the checkered flag sometime in June. If it doesn't release then, I will have no choice but to do the exact same thing I've been doing for the last 2 years.

Continue my wait, as long as it takes...

Pepper grinder –

Waiting time: At least 6 years

Ori and the Will of the Wisps was a game justifiably commended for many things. One aspect in particular was a section of the game where you drill through some sand and launch outwards when you surface. Now imagine this section expanded to the scale of an entire game on its own, that is Pepper Grinder.

A trend you will notice is that I have stumbled onto many of these games through Twitter, and this one is no exception. Had I not found it on Twitter I would have nonetheless discovered it through a Dunkey video talking about his experiences with it PAX 2017.

I imagine Dunkey saw the same potential in this game as I did, being charmed by its lightly abrasive pixel art and its captivating hold on momentum and flow. Looking through it again for this article has shown me it has matured quite a lot since I last investigated it in earnest. The once-solo developer has now partnered with a musician and a porting company. In addition, the game seems to now be published by Devolver Digital so it's certainly in very good hands.

Like everything else on this list, I await its release with great anticipation.

OTHER: Her Loving Embrace –

Waiting time: About 3 years

The release of Undertale in 2015 prompted an explosion in the “Earthbound Inspired” RPG genre. These games tend to focus on quirky characters and dialogue, in addition to having amazing soundtracks. Something else Undertale revitalized was the idea of turn-based combat but with some twists to make it more engaging for a broader audience.

With these aspects in consideration, OTHER: Her Loving Embrace is a quirky RPG with engaging characters, catchy tunes, and combat that opens up a 2d arena to briefly fight in for each turn (as opposed to Undertale's bullet hell segments). Safe to say it wears its inspirations on its sleeve. Despite this, the game has successfully forged its own identity, and I tend to have a soft spot for goofy guys.

A came across this game through a pretty deep rabbit hole I will explain in more detail later in this article (see: Magus Array). I have no idea how far along it is in development, and I am left with no choice but to forget about it for a couple of months and come back to it later like I often do.

I have a lot of faith that this game will turn out well. So much so, in fact, that I actually own a few pins based on the characters of the game. Pins from a game that as of right now, has not yet been released. So here's hoping things turn out well.

Bomb Rush Cyberfunk –

Waiting time: About two years (Since August 11th 2021)

From Team Reptile, the developers of Lethal League comes Bomb Rush Cyberfunk Jet Set Radio.

No, seriously it's basically Jet Set Radio, they even have the original composer (and funny Twitter guy) Hideki Naganuma in this as well. This is a huge boon because a major part of JSR's identity was its banger soundtrack.

I haven't yet played Jet Set Radio, because if I did, it would have to be its now abandoned remake on the Original Xbox, Jet Set Radio: Future. Unfortunately, I haven't been able to experience the rail grinding, public vandalism, and wacky art style that is Jet Set Radio. What I can do instead, is wait for Bomb Rush Cyberpunk. Which, judging by brief snippets, comes very close to its inspirations not only in music as mentioned previously but also in art, gameplay, and just general vibes.

ADDENDUM: Ok so as it turns out I've taken so long to write this article that the release date for Bomb Rush Cyberfunk was announced, August 18th, making it an eventual 3 years total of waiting.

Deltarune –

Waiting time: Little more than a year since the last chapter

It's Toby Fox.

TF2 Heavy update –

Waiting time: 5 years now, ∞ to go

Team Fortress 2 still sits at the #1 spot of my most played games on Steam. Its last update, Jungle Inferno, released in October 2017 came with a promise for at least one other update down the line, the heavy update. The update promised to revitalize the game's titular fat man as it did with Pyro in Jungle Inferno.

Since then my hope has slowly dwindled as a game that I love decays before my eyes. Even with the knowledge that Valve does not get anything done in a timely manner (very relatable, I mean, I've been writing this article for almost a month now), there has been very little indication that a major update is on the horizon, or even in the same solar system.

I still hold hope that it might happen one day, but I am not holding my breath. TF2 is still a playable game, and I do on occasion hop on to play it. However, the writing has been on the wall for years, nobody wants to work on a 12-year-old piece of software when flashier, newer things like Counter-Strike 2 exist as an alternative option to contribute to.

Night runners –

Waiting Time: At Least 3 Years

In me, there exists a desire to drive dangerously down dimly lit streets in gaudy tuner cars. Ever since Need For Speed: Most Wanted, no other racing game has successfully eclipsed its greatness. Nowadays, most racing games commit to full simulation or full arcade, which NFS existed as a nice medium between. Even Need For Speed itself has fallen from grace after brushing against the heavens with Most Wanted. On top of that, it's extremely rare to find any amount of car customization in any of these games. My feeble attempts to fill the steering wheel-shaped hole in my heart with a modded version of Need For Speed: Heat just doesn't quite capture the vibe and gameplay that I wish for. Until now.

From what I can tell this is also a solo development effort but with an extremely deep understanding of the exact kind of experience that has been neglected for so long. All of the menus look like VHS recordings and the showcased depth of customization will allow one to personalize their car to such fine detail that it surpasses even modern Need For Speed games.

My only worry is in the handling model, which can really make or break a game like this. Most Wanted had a very weighty physics system that was challenging without requiring you to know how to actually race a real car. On top of that, it's difficult to discern the feeling of driving just from preview videos alone, so the final judgement rests on when this game finally releases. Regardless, what has been shown so far is really promising and has only gotten better with time.

ULTRABUGS –

Waiting time: Around 4 years

There are few development teams I hold in such high regard as I did for the 2-person studio Vlambeer. All of their games have this hyper-focus on “feeling” that can be difficult to describe in words but is immediately understood when you actually play them. This unspoken language is what set them apart and I've played and adored almost every game they've made.

My eagerness for their upcoming game ULTRABUGS comes from that aforementioned “game feel”. However, it is sullied by the announcement that Vlambeer games has shut down and that ULTRABUGS will be their final game ever.

It's hard to say if this game will ever release, the first of the two developers has gone off to create their own projects such as “Minit” or “Disc Room” and the other has focused on fostering independent game development efforts in underrepresented regions of the world (while also becoming a pilot).

A part of me doesn't want it to release. Its completion will mark an end of an era for indie games, and my experience of playing this game will be bittersweet in its finality.

UFO 50 –

Waiting time: At least 5 years

Speaking of indie game titans, UFO 50 is a collection of 50 mini-games developed for a fictional 8-bit console. The people behind it include Ojrio Fumoto, the developer behind Downwell and POINPY (two games I intend to write a Ghost Notes article about), as well as some other names I don't immediately recognize. The project is spearheaded by the legendary Derek Yu. Derek and the team at Mossmouth are the minds behind one of the greatest roguelites of all time, Spelunky, which people are still making new discoveries in 10 years down the line.

There's really no telling what to expect from a project such as this one. 50 games is a pretty heavy undertaking, no matter how big or small each of them is. It also means that one could expect a huge variety of different ideas executed by some very talented people. I am also very curious to see how the lessons learned from developing Spelunky carry over to this.

In many ways, UFO 50 is quite enigmatic, but overall I think that only adds to the excitement.

Hytale –

Waiting time: About 5 years

Much like Undertale, Minecraft also sparked a wildfire of games that could be considered under the umbrella of “indie survival game”. However, Minecraft's survival mechanics are pretty simplistic and progression is more of an inclined hill than it is a curve. Minecraft is also no stranger to competitors, many attributed Terraria as a “2d Minecraft clone” which while not really true goes to show Minecraft's dominance in the space it occupies.

All this to say, when the team behind one of the most popular Minecraft servers, “Hypixel”, pledges to make a game that intends on going toe to toe against the goliath that is Minecraft, it's bound to garner some attention.

What's interesting to me is Hytale seems to tackle that challenge by creating a foundation that is comparably more developed than its inspirations. It's difficult to say if the sheen coating this game has is simply a thin veneer over an underwhelming experience or if it genuinely advances beyond Minecraft in things like combat and progression. On its surface though, perhaps it would be more accurate to call it a “3d Terraria” as opposed to a Minecraft clone.

Another thing Hytale is doing that really differentiates itself from Minecraft is an extremely high prioritization of modding and custom content. Despite Minecraft having a modding scene comparable to the likes of Skyrim, the relationship Mojang has with its modders is more of a passive acceptance than actual support. Hytale in comparison seems to present something more akin to a game engine that can be modified and shared consistently across all supported devices. This would eliminate the kind of isolation found between console Minecraft players and PC Minecraft players, where PC players get to enjoy the wellspring of modded content available to them while console players are left to make the most of the very limited toolset for customization released for the platform.

Hytale is without a doubt facing a very steep cliff to climb to the top of. However, if executed well, could be a genuinely phenomenal experience the likes of which could only be met with something like Roblox* (unironically). I have no idea if they'll be successful but I don't mind waiting another 5 years to see it polished to perfection.

*I've never personally played Roblox but from an outsider's perspective it looks like GMod for kids, which is honestly insane.

Genokids –

Waiting time: At least 2 years

I forgot about this one so hard that in writing an article about things I was waiting for I hadn't even considered writing about this.

For those of you who were on the old monkey cafe, you may recall a post I made about liking art styles that would go straight to black for shading. The examples from that post were from games like Hades, The World Ends With You, and also this game, Genokids.

Another trend you may notice is a couple of the games I have been watching have a Y2K vibe to them and Genokids looks like an old cartoon from 2005 turned into a hack-and-slash video game. Where these 4 color-coded kids in a band fight against aliens. The game overall seems to be very silly.

Compared to the rest of the games on this list, my knowledge regarding Genokids is fairly limited. Despite that, the art style and presentation have me interested enough to on occasion question how the project is doing. It seems like the initial Kickstarter I found in late 2020 has been taken down (I remember it not being successful), with another one published much more recently getting funded in 24hrs. I'm glad this game is getting the support it deserves.

Honorable Mentions

Cuphead DLC –

Waited for: 4 years

Cuphead is a pretty straightforward concept. Take early 20th-century animation styles and adapt them into a video game. But while the idea is straightforward, their dedication to the craft results in a workflow that can only be described as maddeningly arduous. In the end, studio MDHR braved the gauntlet that is hand animating an entire video game's worth of characters and enemies, and the initial release of Cuphead was met with critical acclaim, and rightfully so. Not to forget scoring the whole thing with a live jazz band.

At the finish line, the question of “what to do next” arises. Much like the straightforward nature of the game comes another direct answer, which was “make more Cuphead”. So in June of 2018, the Cuphead DLC was announced (amusingly abbreviated as the Delicious Last Course).

In June of 2022, it was finally completed and released to the masses. I finished it in 4 days, and then haven't really touched it since.

Those 4 days however were as good as when I played Cuphead the first time. In the end, it was more Cuphead, which is all I ever expected or wanted out of it. The last course was really delicious.

Sable –

Waited for: Something like 3 years, I don't really remember specifics for this

I remember seeing this cool desert game floating around on Twitter. Most striking of which was its comic book art style with thin black outlines around everything you see (Later I learned about Moebius, the inspiration of the art style). As I followed along with its development I learned that this game takes place on a desert planet where you drift along the dunes and explore the world and its scenery.

When the game was finally released in 2021, I remember enjoying it a fair amount. But, because the experience is so heavily based on “vibes”, it quickly soured when the mildly inconsistent optimization made the experience much less seamless. Which is a shame because it really is a beautiful game otherwise. Even now the game is quite stuttery, so unless I manage to swallow that discomfort I will probably not finish it.

What was especially interesting to me about this game was how peaceful it was. You're not really fighting anyone, or saving the world. The entire premise is that it's a journey of self-discovery, traversing the quiet sands and navigating bustling towns. Certainly a rarity among its peers.

Installation 01 –

It's still not out, and I don't care anymore

It's been 7 years since I first learned about Installation 01. Back in 2016 playing Halo on your PC limited you to just the first two iterations of the series, which by that point has had 7 games in its lineup, the most recent of which were released by a different company (called 343 Industries) and were very underwhelming.

This was the niche that Installation 01 was targeting, a modern version of the Halo series, playable on your pc, that stayed true to the classic formula that had since been neglected by 343. I was squarely in that niche, and I wanted to play this game so badly. I subsequently started following their blog posts (where I first learned about ULTRAKILL amusingly), reading their developer updates, and generally invested myself in the progress of this game hoping to see its release one day. That release however... never came.

Where did that leave me then? Fortunately, in the meantime I had learned about another, less legal, halo fan project/mod which I thoroughly enjoyed when it was popular around 2018. On top of that, both of these Halo projects gave Microsoft the kick in the pants to go ahead and port every Halo game to pc starting in 2019. Which brings us to today. If I want to play some good old Halo on my computer, I can do that with no problem, leaving Installation 01 in a sticky situation. Since development took so long, it timed itself into irrelevance.

So now I don't really care about this project anymore. If it releases one day I might give it a shot. In the end, though, it's now obsolete with the current state of the series on PC. A strange case indeed.

Magus Array –

Barely had a pulse to begin with

On April 6th, 2020 a Source Filmmaker animator I follow released another banger video. That video contained a song from a then-unreleased game called Velorum. I really liked that song and investigated further into the artist behind it, who at the time went by the name “brainfoam” (they now go by pngsequence, or Joe). This name lead me to their now defunct website, which also had a list of projects they contributed to including many other “earthbound inspired” RPGs like OTHER, mentioned earlier.

I really felt like I had uncovered an interesting niche, and the general quality of not only their music but their art as well had me feeling as though I had discovered something really special. This was all I needed to start intently watching for any progress regarding whatever this project came to be. At some point the game was rebranded to “Magus Array”, a soundcloud and Twitter page were created and some more minor scraps of music and art were uploaded to each.

Unfortunately, sometime later down the line, the game was cancelled. I don't remember where or when it was announced, but it's been a little while now. This was a little disappointing, as I am quite fond of Joe's art and music, so I was curious to see what game a person like that could make. Fortunately for me, I might be able to do just that. They've been hyping up their newest game, Reflectile, which looks far more like an actual game than Magus Array ever was.

Duel Arms –

Cancelled, and I'm still a little sad about it

In 2018 I stumbled on a little game called Knight Club. It was a fun twist on your typical platform fighter which focused on health bars as opposed to the stamina knockback system found in Smash Bros. I tried it out a little, had a good time, and then put it down for a while. Then, in December 2020 Knight Club had a little rerelease on Steam dubbed “Knight Club+” which polished the game somewhat and also added Steam multiplayer support which made playing online much easier. I bought it for myself and then convinced a few friends to grab some of the free keys they were giving away and try it with me.

Sometime before the release of Knight Club+, I started seeing glimpses of a sequel/remake called Duel Arms. This game seemed to expand on the very solid foundations of Knight Club with a special move system and multiple equippable utility items. However, in 2022 it was cancelled, which like Magus Array, was also disappointing. Sadly, the developer didn't have the money to be able to support themselves while making a game like Duel Arms.

As some kind of consolation, the unfinished build of the game was released on itch.io. I don't really want to try it in the blind hope that the developer stumbles into a million dollars in a ditch and is suddenly able to finish this game properly. So here's hoping for that day to come.

A Fox In Space Episode 2 –

Waited for: at least 6 years

I'm not really a Star Fox fan. I've interacted more with the character's appearances in Smash Bros than I have with the game itself. On the other hand, I really love this 90s-style fan animation of Star Fox. Another solo project, A Fox In Space presents Star Fox as a Saturday morning cartoon, packaged with a meaningful helping of low-fi ambience. As I have no connections to the characters from the games, the renditions shown in the pilot episode were so captivating that I am unable to imagine them differently now.

Animation takes a long time, a long, long time normally. A long, long, long time for one person on their own. This guy, Mathew Gafford, wrote, animated, scored, edited, partially voice-acted, and directed an entire animated episode of this show himself. So I knew that I would be waiting YEARS for the next episode of this show to come out, and years it took, as while writing this article I decided to check on it again and realized that episode 2 finally came out a month ago now. It's 40 minutes long.

Hopefully, it was worth the wait, I'll be watching it soon.