Continuing my exploration of visual media (BDs) and of GRRM universe. Also threw a curveball in there.

Sun and Steel – Yukio Mishima

What the hell can I write about this? I gotta be honest, I don't know if I'm stupid but I didn't understand most of the first part of the book. I don't really think it is meant to be understood, what Mishima describes there is inherently indescribable. It's only in the second part when he grounds himself more in the physical that some things make sense. My man has a deeply unhealthy relationship with the human body. I think he also has a very unhealthy relationship with other human being. I think he needs to touch grass. I like the form though, that it was entirely weird and abstract and deeply and utterly personal. It was definitely just Mishima expressing himself, and he doesn't care if he is pissing in a violin.

Le Grand Pouvoir du Chninkel – Jean Van Hamme, Grzegorz Rosiński

Upon the world of Daar, three factions are fighting senselessly since anyone can remember. The three immortal are at the head of each faction, and there is no hope to ever bury the hatchet. Day and night they fight with humans, apes, dinosaurs, monsters and Chninkel. Chninkel are a slave race of this world, a mix of hobbits and rodents. By some sort of miracle J'on, achninkel, manages to survive one of those battles and flees. As soon as he does, the Great Creator appears before him, tasking him to end the wars, as he has had enough. J'on has three days, he says, after which if he fails the world will be destroyed. Before leaving, the Great Creator bestows upon J'on the Great Power. This task is impossible for an immortal, how can a chninkel hope to prevail?

Another BD, this time a classic of french fantasy. The drawings are awesome, and while originally it came out in black and white, what I read was a colorised re-edition (with the blessing and supervision of the original authors). The story is original, and the setting is nice change from the usual high fantasy setting. The premise really hooked me but it does take a direction I didn't expect. J'on is a bit more passive here, where I would have wished he'd be a bit more in command, really trying to extirpate himself from prickly situations. I did like the religious subplot though and the ending is really good. There's a couple of issues with it though. Being published in 1986 by two white men, we do stumble into the usual pitfalls of fantasy, namely sexism and racism. On the sexism front, the main supporting character G'wen spends half of the BD in various states of undress. That's pretty much all she's there for, apart from also being constantly sexually harassed by J'on. In general, if there is a lady in the BD that's not a background character, you will see their titties. On racism, it is very brief, but it's basically just fetishisation of the black male body. There is a scene with a white blond woman being 'taken' by J'on, who was transformed for this purpose (and also no apparent legitimate reason) into a black human male.

Fire and Blood – GRR Martin

The History of the Targaryen Kings of Westeros, from Aegon I to the regency of Aegon III by Archmaester Gyldayn of Oldtown.

GRR Martin is back at it again, and he managed to trick me into reading a history book, which is my least favourite type of book to read. And I enjoyed every second of it. My man can write and world build. It is also a very interesting concept to have the history of your world be retold in an in-universe history book by an in-universe historian. Completely worth having spoiled myself the end of House of the Dragon, which is adapted from this book. The way everything unfolds naturally, and just makes so much sense without being predictable. GRRM is just the goat and I'm almost looking forward to Blood and Fire (sequel to Fire and Blood) more than Winds of Winter (both will never come out).

A Knight of the Seven Kingdoms – GRRM

Dunk is a squire whose master just died. Thankfully before passing, he made Dunk a knight. So Ser Duncan the Tall is a knight whose master just died. He is sworn to no lord or land and therefore is of the hedge, an itinerant knight always looking for work. With how little he knows of the world, how will he manage to get by?

I am a fiend for anything substantial that GRRM wrote about the ASOIAF universe and have therefore read A Knight of the Seven Kingdoms. There's also gona be an HBO show about it next year, because I guess they have to milk everything out of George before he passes. Anyway, it's not the same calibre as the ASOIAF novels, or even Fire and Blood, but this collection of novellas is still good. There's no intricate plot in the foreground, and the story is a bit more simplistic, but I really appreciated it for the glimpse of lore that it allowed us to see between the events of the Dance of Dragons and A Game of Thrones. It also has a ton of drawings if is great for someone like me who can't visualise anything. It did make my ereader freeze a couple of times though. We also finally have the POV of someone that is a bit more akin to a common man of the Seven Kingdoms (he's still a knight though so very privileged).

Métal Hurlant – third edition – Many authors

Métal Hurlant is a 250 pages french adult trimestral magazine. It's only short forms BDs. Many authors participate in it, and the themes are either horror or SF. The first edition, published between 1975 and 1987, was the ground breaker, really going in hard against the goody two shoes culture at the time. There is gore, there are penises, there's titties and there's themes that aren't talked about at the time. The second edition was shortlived from 2002-2004 and this third edition has been going since 2021. This last one mixes reeditions from the old editions of métal hurlant with some new stuff. I came to learn about Métal Hurlant through interviews of different artists, be it directors, writers, drawers (people that draw) none of them french. And yet each of them claimed to have been really inspired by that french magazine just with the drawings, despite not speaking a lick of french. I thought it would be cool to a get one volume of the new edition for some of the artists on the printhouse. I'll be very brief in my reviews, not to spoil anything as only Vivian got hers as of now.

Volume 2, 7 and 'Cat' Special Edition

Volume 2 is for Andrew. It is so based and is a collection of the best from the first edition. It is very horny.

Volume 7 is for Nick. It's only new stuff, and there are some very interesting modern things in there. It is a bit weird.

The 'Cat' special edition is obviously for Vivian. Every story is related to cats.

That's it for this month. There is some more based stuff waiting for you next month, I'll probably get back to reading word books more too.

Thank you for reading my logorrhea Eddie – Award winning author

I did my best but I'm still late. Oh well. We are back with a lot of content this month, and I also spent some time in my home country at the end of it, so there will be a bit of stuff that I got in France. I have returned to my french roots and introduced a new medium here, the Bande Dessinée or BD. I talked a bit about those in my March 2025 Readings. To give you a quick rundown, the BD is a french comic. It's not american comics written/translated in/into french — there are vast cultural differences between them. We have very broad ranges of topics in France, and those can be quite different from one another, the BD caters to various types of reader of all ages. There isn't any stigma about reading comics, and like most adults have books in Canada, most french people's bookshelf will have a couple BDs as well. My grandpa has them, my mom, cousins, friends, friend's parents... most people that read have a couple. They hold an important spot in french culture. In any case, they rock, but had not graced the shelves of my bookshelf in Canada, and it is about time I remediate that. Before we get into them, let's look at the books and then manga from this month:

A Dance with Dragons – Georges RR Martin

Georges is still cooking with this one, but it is more obvious than ever that the previous book and this one were supposed to be one book. It was weird to see the one off chapters of Jaime and Cercei, and the Dorne plot in the middle of the book. It was cool to see the same events happening from a different POV though (Sam/Jon) and having access to both internal monologues; one in the previous book and the other in this one, it made it really feel like Dune. The Mereen plot kinda drags, and same with Tyrion, it goes pretty slowly. Considering this is the last book in the series so far (and probably ever) it kinda blows that we are nowhere along in the story. I really thought that more would have been written, but alas. Time to read Fire and Blood, another series that will never be finished :)

Cold as Hell – Kelly Armstrong

I told myself I would not read anymore of Haven's Rock novel, after how ass the previous one was, but I lied. I placed a hold on it a while ago on libby and it just became available; I had to see how much of a train wreck this would be. It was fine. There are some major flaws with it, but it was pretty inoffensive.

The beginning of the book is unbearable as always, with a crap ton of repetition, overexplaining and completely unnatural dialogs where people analyse themselves mid sentence and share their analysis out loud. Once it gets going though, it's alright, and we go back to the usual Rockton/Haven's Rock investigation shenanigan. We are introduced to more people here, and not knowing who they are adds a bit to the story. Casey finally does some good detective work without skipping over gigantic clues or extremely obvious deductions. But then, to setup the finale, everyone has to become dumb again. Spoilers ahead. Dalton, who was described many, many times as being overtly overprotective, decides to fly back to Haven's Rock with his 8-months-has-had-contractions-and-misscarriages-scares-and-is-predisposed-to-complications-pregnant wife from a city with a Hospital. And must I add that it was with a storm looming, in the middle of Yukon winter, right after they have discovered that a serial killer resides in Haven's Rock, a very remote town that doesn't have proper equipment and personnel to deal with a complicated birth? And of course, when they get to town and go on a manhunt to catch that serial-killer, in the middle of winter again, in the Yukon wilderness, guess who accompanies them, even if she has started getting other contractions... and then guess what, they split up. and then, guess what they decide to abandon the extremely pregnant lady without weapons with a rando also without weapon 5min away from the town, and then guess what, the serial killer shows up. And finally guess what, while in labour, the described “very small woman” overpowers the described “very strong” non-boypreggers man who has a gun, defeats him and gives birth in the wilderness. Absolutely insane amount of contrivance, and the worst is that, knowing the author, I already guessed some stuff like that was gonna happen right when we learnt that Casey was 8-months pregnant in the book. The rest of the book was pretty good, but my god, the ending was terrible. If the dialogues were worked on a bit more and if the story could refrain from going all out on the spectacle at the expanse of logic it could really elevate the books with very little efforts.

The Remains of the Days – Kazuo Ishiguro

That was a banger of a book. The prose was great and went hand in hand with the story, both really complemented each other. After you realise that a lot of the harmful opinions the main character has is due to his misplaced sense of loyalty and trust to bad men, you kinda feel pity for him. He really is a victim of the system, and it's his indoctrination by his masters and the general english high-society that leads him to shed every ounce of humanity, for the profit of those masters. It was really interesting reading about his almost change in point of view caused by his travel, and was devastating that, even if he came so close to waking up, he in the end just slips back to his comfortable and complacent servitude. I find it especially heart-breaking that he completely missed the meaning of the stranger at the end in a way, and instead of appreciating the work he's done, without dwelling on the past, and kicking back, he instead takes it as stop reflecting on his past mistakes and start looking forward to the work we'll accomplish in the future. Even if to the reader it is incredibly obvious from his writing that he has completely wasted his life by living sticking to his arbitrary principles, until the very end when he reflects about his meeting with Miss Kenton, he's almost completely oblivious to it. It is kinda crazy to think about people living their whole lives for other people, and it really sucked for Steven that he lived more than half of his life for a nazi sympathiser, who almost got England on bord with nazism. In miscellaneous notes, I found that the author really managed to create the most insufferable “english patriot” (derogatory), especially during his description of the english landscapeand objective beauty, and my french blood was boiling when he was speaking about the best races that make butlers, where he insults the celts, my people! I found it extremely funny his whole reflection about the butler profession and his little butler leaderboard, where he fangirls over some butlers. The butler gatekeeping (apart from the racist part) was also hilarious. I also loved how he, the stuck-up, broom-in-the-ass british man, was was completely incapable of bantering or having a shred of humour. The story about the tiger rocked though.

To answer Spenny's question, the GOAT was of course Miss Kenton. (Although Harry is a close second)

Grappler BAKI – Keisuke Itagaki

Childhood Saga – Chapters 143-180

The shenanigans continue and we get some more fighting. This does a great job at setting up the beef that Baki has with his father, and despite the extremely unserious nature of the manga, we get some very emotional moments that don't fall flat, unlike a certain pirate manga that overuses people crying for no reason. The panel in question was actually goated if you have the whole context:

Maximum Tournament – Chapters 181 – 277

Holy hell the time transitions are extremely rough. The fan translations are also pretty old and the scans are not of the greatest quality. It's a bit too much fighting right after another without much breathing. There are also way too many people introduced at the same time. And speaking of introductions, the way the Itagaki writes about the black zulu fighter is actually insane, and not in a good way, if you catch my meaning. Holy hell.

Néandertal (L'intégrale) – Emmanuel Roudier

Le Cristal de Chasse, Le Breuvage de vie, Le Meneur de Meute (Tome 1, 2, 3)

Laghou is a cripple, and despite being the best craftsman of his tribe, he is not well seen by a majority of the men folk who only value hunting. After his father dies, a chain of event unfolds leading him to leave his tribe, searching for one other in particular. Will this half-portion survive his journey and find this tribe?

This was really good, and a nice way to get back into BDs. The drawings are awesome and the story, although really, really fast paced was great. It might have lacked a bit of depth, but in total it's a 165-ish pages series so you can only get so much depth. It's nice to get a story set during this time (caveman time) which is something we don't see often, and one of my favourite setting. I think the creatures of that time and place are cool as hell, and they look fantastique here. Everything is gorgeous overall, but my favourite are the landscapes, which we have the pleasure to see often with the many panels where people travel, and the way the artist did the eyes, which I though were always very expressive. It was a bit disconcerting that everybody in the BD was speaking with a rather elevated language — not that I was expecting they all speak in grunt because they're neanderthals — but I was expecting more everyday french rather than literary french.

L'Aigle sans Orteils – Christian LAX

A one-shot retelling of the first few Tours de France, a cycling race where cyclist literally ride all around France, a cool 4700km at that time. It was first held in 1903, and apart from a couple of years during the World Wars, it has been held every year since. This retelling is through the lens of a fictional character, loosing his toes (hence the title), trying his darnest to win the Tour.

This was absolute cinema, the story was extremely engaging, the drawing gorgeous, and that's with me not ever giving a shit about le Tour de France. I loved the story of Amédée Fario, his tenaciousness despite his great handicap. I also like the friendship between him and Camille Peyroulet. The whole things was gorgeous, and I also really loved the colours, the palette used was very expressive but also restrained and consistent. The lines were kinda “brouillon” but it worked really well, breaking down people into simpler figures, while keeping a ton of detail. Going back to the story, the ending is very sobering. After failing to finish his last Tour in 1914, almost winning, the main character is eager for more, and eager to finally beat all his competitors, Petit Breton, le Géant... This will not come to be, as he dies, with all the athletes of le Tour de France, during WW1, where 25% of all french men aged 18-30 died, with much more coming back physically or mentally injured.

Le Tour des Géants – Nicholas Debon

A historical retelling of the 1910 Tour de France.

Alrightly, more Tour de France. There wasn't an overarching emotional story here to keep one engaged, so I had a bit more trouble getting invested in this one. The storyline they chose for the race was pretty bare bone and repetitive as well. It was still interesting to learn about all the shortcomings of the bicycle of the time — wooden tire frames that would just break, the fragility of tires that would just explode incessantly, having to remove the back wheel to change gears, if you had access to gears to start with... The pastel drawings were really good though, and I really loved the colour pallet. The choice of pastel really gave it a welcomed artsy vibe which was reinforced with the decision to have mostly panels with narration at the bottom and no speech bubbles, and having the speech bubbles take either the whole top or bottom half of a panel. The 'framing' was also very dynamic, with a lot of different uhh.. camera angles and interesting shots (I don't know how to talk about drawings).

Astérix et Obélix – Jean-Yves Ferri, Fabcaro, Didier Conrad

Le Griffon & L'Iris Blanc (Tome 39 & 40)

Astérix and Obélix has been a staple of the franco-belge BD since the 1960's and is extremely popular in France, and even abroad with it being the second most sold “comics” series after One Piece. I remember it very fondly having, as any self-respecting french person, read them. The original duo is not at the helm anymore however, with the writer René Goscinny dying in 1977 and Albert Uderzo leaving in 2009 (and dying in 2020). The latest volumes since, starting in 2013 with Jean-Yves Ferri then Fabcaro starting in 2023 writing and Didier Conrad drawing, have not been the best according to most members of my family. My mom lend me those last two from 2021 and 2023, and I found them just a touch above alright. I have read most of the previous ones as my grandpa religiously collects them, and there were more “important” themes broached in those, in the midst of the usual fun ambiance. There was also some extremely french specific humour, with untranslatable puns and references to obscure french culture or little facts of (french) life — but it was funny. With those, there is not much besides the story, which is pretty straight forward and while not bad, it's a bit less content than we're used to. Especially since they are so short, at a bit less than 50 pages. The second one was better in this first regard, and was definitely almost on par with the average originals, but again way too short and devoided of heavier stuff. The drawing is however, as good as ever, and Didier Conrad has a great command of motion, while keeping things very simple and true to the original.

That's all for this month, and was quite a lot. I should read less because writing those reports is taking too much time. Expect more BDs next month.

Thank you for reading my logorrhea Eddie – Award winning author

When I was young my dad would always tell me stories about driving out west to the mountains in a van, staying in random places, doing odd jobs here and there, and just exploring Canada. He was a farm guy, knew how to repair all of his own stuff because he'd worked on cars and planes (not the professional way, in a fixer upper kind of way). He would tell me stories of his adventures, and never let the truth get in the way of a good story. I've always wanted to explore this way, just going somewhere and seeing what happens. New people, new places, maybe it works maybe it doesn't, but either way getting a story out of it. At some point, he told me “A story is the currency of life,” and that kind of stuck. Everywhere you go and everyone you meet, everyone just wants some fun stories. I think the wisdom is pretty on the ball, but you could not imagine how on the ball it was when he was telling stories over a hash oil lined pin of a joint that had 4 people off the zoinkys. There are many reasons I don't think particularly highly of him, but there are still some great memories and he still raised me, so there's still love there. I guess part of that is his stories helped form some of my dreams of exploration and how I want to do it.

My grandfather also told stories of going out west to the mountains. He wasn't the most outdoorsy guy, he was a business guy and quite a square, down to the physical shape of him. I'm talking as close as a real person can get to Disney's UP levels of square. His story always seemed to center more around Mt. Temple. To be frank, it was probably just something he read about, but the general concept of him having been to Banff and him telling me about Mt Temple, the ideas are connected. Now that I'm writing this I can't imagine him hiking up a mountain, but maybe when he was younger and his ankles weren't quite as swollen he was more adventurous than he was in old age. Either way, he also made me yearn for the mountains. His dinner time stories were the first times I thought of the mountains not as this mythical place in the yonder, but had me looking up how I could realistically go.

My mom also somehow had an experience living in a van in the mountains near Banff. She said they would just drive around and pull over whenever they saw something they wanted to do or needed to sleep or something. You can't do that now, and I don't really have any more information from her spare the extremely obtuse general story, but that means that everyone older than me in my close family I've known for years has been out there. The last is my sister, who with her disability I'd put at unlikely to be on any large or difficult hikes, so I guess that leaves me to go see the mountains.

I seriously considered doing the whole van life thing for a couple of years. Tall Mercedes Sprinter, load it up, Murphy bed, water system, electrical, everything mapped out and costed in my uni days. I just needed the money for that damn van. Then Covid happened, van life became a cool way for people to live vicariously by watching people travel while staying at home, and the price of tall sprinter vans went way up. Family tensions of the time rising also made it harder to balance being the only one in contact with both my dad's and mom's side of the family. That, by extension, would have made it harder to have the van (I live on my mom's side) and make the van (building things was my dad's side). That idea was really cool, but unfortunately was just not to be.

Time skip, couple more years down the line, The Muggies was back for its second annual occurrence with all its glory, gold, and glamour. We had many esteemed guests in from across the planet in an awe-striking event of Jungian synchronicity, coalescing under the vaulted ceilings of a lavish party room for a night like no other. It was a night so monumental that legend wouldn't be able to approach the experience of actually being there. Many memories were made, a couple engaged, and I chatted with a first time guest to The Muggies who, conveniently to the plot line presented so far in this story, happens to live in Calgary.

I know, I know, some readers may be rolling their eyes at plot conveniences like this, but if plot conveniences didn't happen like that, the story wouldn't be told. It's survivourship bias. You couldn't imagine how many sci-fi stories get scrapped part way through the story because the main characters died before the big finale. Could you imagine being the author of a story like that? It would be crushing.

Anyways, this guest, Elena, and I kept in touch, mostly about UFC events as they happened. It took 5 or 6 hints that I wanted to go hiking I think for her to probably start to feel slightly comfortable with the concept of me being around. Eventually we were left with the decision for pre or post wildfire season. We looked at potential schedules of when it could work and how to move around and such, and looking at the calendar, we decided on pre. The week of May 5th was promising for both of us, and while there were some days that weren't ideal, work and such getting in the way, there were enough working days to get us in the mountains twice, then I could explore more of Calgary by my lonely on the last days.

I booked the flights in a rush, then got asked where I was planning on staying. I checked the cost of hotels, and seeing some extremely convenient places in mountains, I checked my bank and asked if there was any extra couch space. The order of operations made this a rather bold and brash moment, but there was indeed a blow up couch, and with that and a rental car, the trip was set. We came up with some loose plans, and from there, the waiting game was on.

I left for Calgary at 6:30 AM. I got to the airport a bit after 4 30 AM and was at the terminal by 4 45. Turns out on domestic flights if all you have is one backpack you can practically just walk through the entire airport with no problems. I listened to some music because the airport wasn't particularly comfy, got on the flight which also wasn't comfy enough to sleep on, then showed up in Calgary at a whopping 8 30 AM with a timezone change. This was one of the aforementioned days where Elena had real life responsibilities, and I picked the early flight because it was cheapest. I got an absolutely banging shawarma that some Torontonians still struggle to comprehend, then started wandering to see what was around town. I was in a sleep deprived zombie state, and in my several hours of wandering just like the intro to Rambo First Blood, I ended up in a coffee shop. I was wiped, and I'd done everything I could think of. My body was telling me it was around the end of the work day, so I checked the time to see I'd made it all the way to almost 1 PM. I wandered back past the house and managed to catch a family member there. I got invited in, and the next thing I remember was waking up when everyone got back home after work.

We had a delicious family dinner on the 4th, we chatted and laughed and it was a fun yet surreal experience. Something that worked out when we were planning the trip was that my dad, probably the person I was copying the most in making this trip, died on May 5th 2023. This event hit my grandpa hard and tanked his cognitive function. My sister has a feeding tube, and my mother eats sporadically on a different schedule from me. I don't exactly have family dinners anymore. With the lack of family dinners in my life and my already, I'll put it as, rambunctious style, I was a little worried about how it might work out. Often times, being around a family in general is a weird enough experience. Luckily I'm over the days of normal families making me bitter, but seeing families just be families is still something I have to actively figure out each time. I am pleased to report that this was a great family dinner. The food was delicious. The family was friendly. I ate until I couldn't anymore, and chatted to my heart's content. I had prepared for the chance of this being a bit of a mental landmine, but I managed to even forget all about those stresses for the time being. Freshly napped but still exhausted, I got a brief introduction to the chainmail making process, then I passed out as soon as my head hit the pillow, off to the next day.

Off to the mountains! Elena found a gorgeous queen, Adele, who wanted to hike too. We found the bear spray, learned that it expired a decade ago, got new bear spray, and hit the road. The mountains were off in the distance, then they got bigger, then they got bigger, then they were all around us the the point that I couldn't see the peaks while I was driving. There were goats and caribou or something on the side of the road (it was hard to look too closely since I was driving). There were waterfalls around us. There were patterns in the snow peaks that sure may appear in pictures, but they're just so much more to actually see there. I saw the exit for Mt Temple, and let me tell you, that was a big mountain. It was a monolith that just towered above us and I was awe struck. We stopped in town for a coffee and to pick up some IPAs for the hike, and off we went.

We parked, and it was a short walk to Lake Louise. Elena and Adele had both been there and said it was incredible and the colour of the water was just something that had to be experienced. I am still yet to experience it, because as it would turn out, it was still frozen. It's not that it wasn't incredible, we just weren't expecting it to be ice. We walked on the ice a bit and Adele and I got some pictures, then we decided to take a look at the further hikes. There was a tea shop at one of the farther points that was interesting to me as a tea guy, so we set our sights on that. It was a more difficult hike, but I'd trained for this. We walked 10 meters, then confronted with snow and ice on the path, put our crampons on and got moving.

At the start, I was off to the races and the girls were finding their footing. I'd trained a lot for the uphill march on the treadmill as much as I could, but slowly the turns did table. The girls warmed up, and I was once again confronted with one of my greatest enemies: the direction up. We would make good progress but I quickly realized I couldn't eat or drink despite knowing that my body needed it. I started to slowly feel worse and worse, needing more stops. These stops had absolutely stunning views, which helped my case for trying to be cool and not admit that I was stopping because I was physically suffering. I'm a 25 year old guy, I'm supposed to not only be invincible but also be nonchalant about it. My stomach had dropped and couldn't hold anything. My kidney or something in that area started aching, and another internal pain started to make me realize I could hardly walk. I stopped and kind of looked at the girls who were frolicking having the time of their lives, and I was ready to admit that I wasn't going to make it. I shouldn't be Icarus, and I should probably turn back before my body rejects me. They told me we were in sight of the last staircase, which went up beside a beautiful waterfall. I just had to make the last 50 odd meters happen, so I pushed on just a little bit more.

We made it to the top, and the tea shop was boarded up and closed. The lake up there was frozen too, so we sat on the top of a bench that was covered in snow to snack and recover. Elena gave me some grapes, and I could feel each and every one sink into my stomach like it was lead. I made it through half a sandwich baggie and I could feel the acid, but I couldn't bring myself to eat any of the carbs we brought because they looked too dry. We sat and chatted, some strangers chatted too, and slowly but surely, I started to recover. I guess my body found those calories and put them to work on maintaining my vitals. I opened the IPA we bought in town, and as someone who usually hates pictures, we had taken in the view and got to work posing. I think instead of just taking pictures, we got experimental enough that I really found there was a lot of joy to be had here. It really felt like we were putting together some art, and with some inspiration from JoJo's, we really got some great pictures like I've never taken before. I think I would be happy getting several of these framed.

I brought my dad's aviation jacket with me in my bag in case it was cold. The hike was hard enough that I had to take off my sweater that I wore there because despite the snow, I was overheating. I guess a piece of him was with me up there. I'd planned a little something to commemorate him, but in the end, the jacket didn't make it out of the bag, and I think that was the best way. I'll take the inspiration that brought me there, but I think it's fair to say that we made it to the top of the mountain on our own adventure. I don't have much family left, so I don't really get to tell most of the people that inspired me that I got to go up the mountains. It may be a bit melancholy, but on the other side I found it rather freeing. It's just mine. In it's own way, I think that kind of makes this trip the farthest step from home for me, the most notable instance of me just doing things as I want to do them. No need for family to supervise. No need for extensive planning. No need for anything. Just going somewhere and seeing what happens. Kind of like when they take the farthest step away from home in Lord of the Rings. This was the farthest I've been in my own little path I make for myself. I liked it a lot, and I want to do more of it.

One more generation on top of the mountains.

We made it back down the mountain, which was way faster and easier than the way up, and on the return, found ourselves by a lake for the sunset. We skipped stones while the sun slowly went down, then made the drive back home. There were other fantastic adventures I had on this trip too. The Dinosaur Museum, the hoodoos, Drumheller in general, the lookout over the valley, the mountaintop by Banff, the hike with the waterfalls, getting the gay talk, the comfy tree, the market. I had an amazing trip, and would like to thank Elena and her family for hosting me and being so kind. None of this would have been possible without you.

Life could be a dream All my precious plans would come true If you could take me up to paradise up above

Oncle Spenny

We are back in business ladies, gents and others. I have been gifted a lovely e-reader by my lovelier wife Tetyana, and have begun sailing the seas of ink in Jack Sparrow's fashion (I pirate books). I have also finally joined the Toronto Public Library, and am also acquiring books that way. Obviously, I check Libby for books before obtaining them officially and legally from eastern european sources, to support the TPL. In any case, it is easier than ever for me to read, and I do, as you can see below:

A Storm of Swords – Georges RR Martin

Not much to say here, it's good. It starts out very slow though, and the pace kinda grinded to a halt, but we pick back up a couple hundred pages later. Ngl, I'm reading all the books one after another without stopping, so the events blur in my memory and I can't remember what happens in what book, and therefore cannot really write a proper review of something I've finished at the beginning of the month.

Kill All Normies – Angela Nagles

I had an epub of this lying around (no doubt coming from Spencer), and also have heard it referenced a couple of times from the bookclub peeps, so I thought I would read it. It is also very short, so that helps. I have never been chronically online, and even less now as I have forgone all social media and news apps. I was a bit more online during the period this book about, which is set around the early and mid 2010's during the radicalisation of the online spaces, and the rise of the alt-right. The book was alright. It's surface level and very descriptive in its approach rather than analytical, which is what I was originally expecting. This felt more like the script of a very long video essay/summary than a well-thought-out book. I found that at some points she was giving a bit too much benefit of the doubt/credit to the deranged individuals composing 4-chan and the early new right. The description of what was going on the left side of the aisle is also pretty biased. I have no doubt that Angela Nagles sees herself as the enlightened centrist during those time, not being part of the alt-right; doxing, threatening, harassing, being racist, homophobic and other -ist and -phobic words, while also not being part of the “crazy” left, whose crimes are equal if not worse: “inventing” genders, “faking” oppression and cancelling people online for not being politically correct.

With this book, you at least get the broad strokes of what went down during this time, if through a coloured lens.

A Feast for Crows – Georges RR Martin

This book was goated. Probably my favourite so far. I really liked the Cersei chapters. It is so well written and doesn't hold you by the hand, or think for you. Cersei tells it how she thinks it is, and you are to figure out how much of an unreliable narrator she is. The whole Dornish subplot, if a bit slow to get going, was interesting. The world building is as usual top-tier. I also loved the later Jaime chapters, where he forsakes Cersei and starts his “healing journey”.

This book is missing a lot of perspectives however, and its ending is quite abrupt. Not that there is a cliffhanger, but it just ends at an awkward spot. Brienne's POV does end on a massive cliffhanger though, and considering that the next book, and last since 2011, is supposed to be part 2 of a Feast for Crows with the missing POVs, it might remain a cliffhanger until Georges releases Winds of Winter — which is never.

No Baki this month, I've been quite busy and reading books is easier than mangas. It will be back as soon as I finish ASOIAF, which is pretty soon.

Thank you for reading my logorrhea Eddie – Award winning author

Only one book and a bit of manga, but your honour, you must understand, I was travelling and as soon as I came back, I had to move — I could not possibly have read any more. And this only book was pretty big, here see for yourself:

A Clash of Kings – Georges RR Martin

Everything is still good and the plot continues in a satisfying manner. One big strength of the series is that the characters are evolving very naturally, and there is no decision they make that seems out of line. This is basically a ratfic if you will. Another great thing to see is that while the first book was very regular fantasy, with a tone akin to the first book of the Stormlight Archives, where despite the setback you still had hopes (the nightwatch not being what Jon thought it would be —> him climbing the ranks and making friends, or Robb being inexperienced at war and fighting against a much bigger force —> still managing to be all victorious in the early stages of the war). Here things take a dark turn and hope is getting scarce. You can definitely feel that things can only get darker from here.

Grappler BAKI – Keisuke Itagaki

Childhood Saga – Chapters 78-143

The tomfoolery continues and I still love it. Where the manga could easily have been slop power fantasy, here our boy Baki gets fucked up, loses, trains and comes back stronger. And after that he still faces against opponents that are stronger than him and gets his ass handed to him. For such a demented manga, the author sure does know how to make the protagonist's progression still interesting.

That's all folks, I was and still am busy as hell.

Thank you for reading my logorrhea Eddie – Award winning author

Ranking scheme:
0 – Almost everything here sucks 1 – Most songs pretty bad, maybe a couple songs that are good
2 – The time simply passed, never enough to stand out good or bad 3 – Mostly meh but with some highlights 4 – Has a good chunk of songs I like
5 – Majority of this is really good 6 – Everything here is really good 7 – Just about everything here is fantastic 8 – Everything here is incredibly compelling

Note: I think all of these are incredible albums, and someone else making distinctions on “Spencer only thought everything here was really good instead of everything here is fantastic” is so hair splitting it doesn't make sense. Just enjoy all the great music. Everything in the main list I have listened to front to back multiple times and loved it each time. I keep my numbers just because it's mine. I link songs I think show the albums and their sounds well. Give them a listen, and give the whole album a spin if you like them. There are some seriously good songs in here with some incredible verses even in the extras.

EUSEXUA – FKA Twigs: 7

Dance Music / EDM

Absolutely incredible album. It is raw, and incredibly sexual in a way that isn't just sexy, but to quote one of the songs, is more craving and rabid. It is a truly primal sexual album that gets really intimate with the nightlife and raw experience of being out there in a certain kind of way. The soundscape and album cover complement it well, being a glamorous yet clearly grimy and off-kilter experience. I have listened to FKA Twigs before this, and it was never able to quite suck me in anywhere near as much as this album did. Maybe it's just my current phase of life or maybe it's the absolute quality of the album, but I cannot stop listening to all of these songs.

Drums of Death SOTY

Sticky

From The Private Collections of Saba and No ID – Saba, No ID: 7

Hip Hop / Jazz Rap

This was an album that I really liked on the first listen, having multiple songs stuck in my head. The production is fantastic, the flows are great, and it's another great addition to my love of rapper-producer collab albums. There is plenty of internal reflection, vulnerability, and interesting lyricism here, but it also seems to draw heavily on other rappers specifically. There are moments in the songs where I thought there was a feature, or I recognized flows as a 1-to-1 copy of moments from other great songs. Usually, this might be something I would dislike, but on an album this deliberate, this creative, and this wonderfully crafted. Instead of coming across as stealing flows, it feels like it gives credit to other great songs, and made me feel like it accepted that artists can creatively use other flows. Originally, I gave this a 6, which is an amazing score, but then I heard it at Nana's house with a high-quality surround sound system. This production bounces around you, echoes back and forth, and adds to the intensity so much with how it is able to cut through what I expect, a great song, and give me what is truly a larger listening experience that is so much more than the sum of its parts, which were already fantastic.

Woes Of The World

How To Impress God

Hurry Up Tomorrow – The Weeknd: 6

Synth Pop / RnB

I wasn't expecting to love a Weeknd release like I did this one. It is very long, running an hour and a half, but there aren't really any lowlights to note, which is incredible. The album's consistency is fantastic and the highs are fantastic, and often across the record, he gets incredibly personal beyond what I expect for an artist of this magnitude. The album in my opinion could use a little more sonic diversity over such a runtime, but as he seems to be retiring his performer name, I'm glad to see him go out with a bang as well as an expansive project.

Cry For Me

Take Me Back To LA

Satisfied Soul – Brother Ali, Ant: 6

Jazz Rap / Lyrical Rap

I admit, I might just be a real sucker for this specific style of rapping and production. This album caught me off guard. I saw it in a post, wrote it down, and then came back to it at a later date just because I like rapper-producer collab albums as I find it grants a good vision with a consistent sound opportunity to shine. That happened here. I opened it, noticed it was a guy with albinism, looked it up, saw a white rapper, prepared myself for whatever I would get, and then got blown away. It reminds me quite a lot of Miles by Blu and Exile but is so clearly distinct from it. Nice stories, nice rapping, fantastic and bright production, and a realness to the rapping that really made it connect with me. From start to back I'm engaged and enjoying myself. From what I gather, some of this might have been recorded on his phone too, but that's just a word I saw somewhere. This is the type of album I can really feel on my own time but also not hesitate to play for other people too, which is rare for music I really love. My only complaint is that the first leg of the album, while good, isn't quite as strong as the later songs.

Higher Learning at the Skyway

Mysterious Things

A City Drowned in God's Black Tears – Infinity Knives and Brian Ennals: 6 w/ love

Aggressive Rap / Opera / Anti-Nazi Edgy

This is an insane album. It starts off going all in on anti-Israel bars with an abrasive and aggressive style, moves to a song opening by hoping a piece of shit died a painful death over a heavenly beat, into an opera cut, into more aggressive songs with bars about consent and squirting? This scratches a certain itch in being extremely edgy but also extremely progressive. It has the edge, the anger, the feeling that you shouldn't be saying that, but if I get to the actual bars, it's really just spot on through and through. I know there was the whole “dirtbag left” thing or whatever, but I think it's really nice to get a release of anger or something while listening to some songs that hit on points about things you're also pissed off about. I love the hard cuts. I love the soft cuts, and I have listened to this album a ton. My only negative with this album is that I just don't really care for the last song which is really long. It has no major flaws, just isn't for me, but if you really like that song too more power to you.

BAGGY

Trevoga

GOLLIWOG – Billy Woods: 6

This was a really interesting album. Billy Woods I find does incredibly well when over weirder, more experimental beats, and this album is full of horror-themed beats, which is a style I loved from him before on one of my favourite albums out there, Aethiopes, and he did incredible work again here. Having multiple different producers I thought gave it an interesting experience of getting what felt like different artists takes on what type of dark or scary beat Billy might like, and Billy then collaborating with each one. Billy continues to drop incredibly concise and abstract bars in a way you can only really know if you listen to Billy Woods, but more impressively he does so incredibly well so consistently with such a fast turnaround time. I did find I enjoyed the beats that stuck to the horror more to be more interesting, and as I mentioned Aethiopes before, listening to this album really made me want to listen to that album more, and I think it also hit me at a time where I realized I was listening to way too much Billy Woods overall. That made it an incredible album that I really enjoyed, but couldn't quite get into as much as I would have liked, or maybe as much as the album deserves. I will revisit this album and it's not unlikely that the score might even go up.

STAR187

A Doll Fulla Pins

Viagr Aboys – Viagra Boys: 8

I absolutely love this album. Start to back. Usually, even for albums I love there are songs I might like less or more or something like that, but for this album, every time a song starts I'm like “Of fuck yeah I get to listen to this again” and it's been every listen of nonstop listening. It's concise enough to deliver on concepts and themes, abstract enough to hit a good weirdness feeling, gross enough to scratch that gross punk itch, clean enough to remain super catchy, punchy enough to be hard-hitting, and gentle enough to be emotional when it's right. I feel like I pick up exactly what he's putting down every single time anything happens. Every song is an earworm for me. God it just rocks.

Man Made of Meat

Pyramid of Health

Medicine for Horses

Others

I have listened to 30-odd albums so far and it's been a great year of music listening. Here are some more albums with little blurbs and a demo song. If you like the genre or the song, I really enjoyed all these albums too, so give them a shot!

Life is Beautiful – 2Chains, Larry June, The Alchemist: 5

Luxury Rap

2Chains links up with some of the best Alc production since Alfredo, one of my favourite albums of all time. I think 2Chains moving towards a more luxurious sound instead of trap beats was a great decision, and his charisma really shines.

Munyon Canyon

Dear Psilocybin – Zelooperz Real Bad Man: 5

Hip Hop / Rap

Real Bad Man is back with his slick, low-key, yet still interesting production and once again evolving and taking it to a new level. The beats here are super interesting while retaining the almost empty space they occupy, and someone as eccentric as Zeloopers is an amazing pairing with him for an album. They do work well together, but often Zelooperz comes across as nearly comatose in his delivery, where I think a more exciting performance more akin to his performance on Wildstyle with The Alchemist would have made the project significantly more interesting, even with retaining the same subject matter and lyrics.

Sweet Celine

12 – Westside Gunn: 5

Griselda / Rap

Westside Gunn does his thing with another album that is fun, has great production, hard bars, and is overall solid. While it is great front to back, I do really feel like this doesn't differentiate itself from his last album very much at all, and is very soon after. Listening to it, I really did feel like I had just listened to something very much like it, but this one has a far less compelling cover.

Adam Page

Infinity – Smif'N'Wessun: 5

Oldhead Rap

If you're an old head this is the album for you, and I really liked it a lot on first listen. It's good old-school rapping with solid beats that feel old-school while still feeling fresh and having modern mastering. It's safe to say that these guys have still got it and in a big way. I've been saying for a while now that the older guys have a honed craft and a little more wisdom that makes their music so good, and I like that a lot. I think there could have been more interesting longer-form storytelling, but we take good music when it's given to us. Oldheads, check this out.

Moses Promise

Timbo Progression – Timbaland: 6 (EP)

Afrobeats / Hip hop

This album sounds pretty great, though is pretty samey. Timbaland being an advocate for AI makes me wonder if some of this sameyness is the fact that it is AI. Still sounds great. It is short and I did very much enjoy the listening experience, so I will rate it fairly well. I will note that I will rate it as an EP, which means I don't expect the full-scale project scope that I would of an album. It's a fun little piece with some very digestible Afro beats.

Kent's Bounce Pt 1

Black Samson The Bastard Swordsman – Wu-Tang Clan and Mathematics: 5

WuTang / Oldhead Rap

This was a really good WuTang album that I think is probably everything a fan would hope for. The beats were clean and fun, and the rapping was really good. I think having Mathematics come in on production made it have a much more modern sound which really helped the group as a whole achieve a better project. Some may have issues with AI used in transitions, and others may have issues with a bunch of reused verses, but I'll say that this is a much greater album that had my enjoyment slightly hampered by some external factors. If you're going in fresh and just want to hear some really great songs from some certified unc rappers, you're in for a treat.

Mandingo

Conversational Pieces – Boldy James: 5

Griselda / Detroit Rap

Boldy has been dropping so insanely often and while it hasn't been bad, it hasn't been near great either. This is a return to form for him, and I think really highlights the issue he has where he needs to pick some more interesting beats if he wants to make a good project. His rapping is consistently pretty damn great, but the use of an interesting beat makes this album just so refreshing. Some of the songs here are absolutely astoundingly good.

Come Back Around

Conversational Pieces

Potluck – Bruiser Wolf: 5

Oldhead Rap / Punchline Rap

Bruiser Wolf managed to step up his game with this one, and I was already a big fan of his last. Still incredibly charismatic and funny, still in his own lane making some of the most fun rap I get to listen to. While his previous album had maybe some more personal cuts, he comes through with an incredibly consistent album full of incredible production and songs littered front to back with fun punchlines. Even the cover just manages to perfectly fit his style, and hopefully, I get to see him live again with this one.

Say No More

Whippin

Worst Song of the year:

Never Again by Mario Judah

Frontmatter

This article is an incredibly long argument for why I find the NFL relatively boring and the CFL incredibly exciting, even though NFL players are objectively better athletes. The article mainly focuses on the rules differences and cultural context of the two games. If you are an American, just know that I love you and this article is not an attack on you, it's an attack on a version of football that I do not like.

The first two sections explain the historical context of football and the rules of football. If you already know the rules of both types of football, skip section 2. If you know the rules of one type of football but not the other, you should read section 2. If you don't know anything about football, I've provided a glossary section at the end of the article that explains in detail what the terms mean. If you don't find sports interesting but want to know why I love Canadian football for meta-game reasons, skip sections 2 and 3. If you like sports but hate football, you are an insufferable contrarian. Read the entire article in penance.

1. Historical primer

In 1861, 13 years before the first snap was played on American soil, two groups of students at UofT gathered in a common area on school grounds with the goal of playing a game inspired by accounts of the full-contact “Rugby football” game played at the Rugby Public School. At the time, “Rugby football” (not to be confused with the technically younger than Canadian football “Association football”, codified by the Laws of the Game two years later in 1863) was a game played at English boarding schools without a strict rules code and was yet to develop into the modern Rugby Union format, an entirely different sport that I also enjoy watching. Those Canadian students didn't know it yet, but their strange broken-telephone interpretation of a game for wealthy British children would serve as the foundation of the single most profitable professional sports league on planet Earth.

Over the next few years, as Americans shot each other over slavery , the first inter-collegiate football rivalry was established between Toronto's “Varsity Blues” and McGill's “Redmen.” In 1874, an exhibition game between McGill and Harvard using Canada's version of Rugby football was played to a riveting 0-0 finish after 3 quarters (you'd think McGill and Harvard students would know how to count to 4!) This was the first time that football as it currently exists was played in the United States, and was an instant success despite the appalling score.

From Harvard, McGill, and UofT, football spread across Canada and the United States. Initially a collegiate game, it did not take long for the first pro team, the Ottawa Football Club(still a member of the CFL), to be established in Canada's capital in September of 1876. In 1892, the first American pro team, the Alleghany Football Club (now defunct) was established. American and Canadians played the same game until 1906, when the Americans added an objectively positive innovation to increase scoring: the forward pass. To the NFL's credit, this is a great change. In 1912, the games permanently diverged after a series of further changes designed to increase scoring were added by the American side.

All of this is to say that football is a Canadian sport. The American game is in fact a bastardization of our perfect game of football! In this article I will argue that the rules of Canadian Football make for a more enjoyable viewing experience than the American rules, which seem perfectly tailored to bore both players and spectators alike.

2. The rules of the Canadian and American games

At their core, American and Canadian football are more similar to each other than either is to their closest taxonomic relatives, Rugby league and Rugby union. In both footballs, the objective is to out-score the other team. Scoring is done in the following ways:

• A touchdown for 6 points
  • After a touchdown, the scoring team sets up 25 yards from the uprights and attempts to score a field goal, giving an additional 1 point.
  • Alternatively after a touchdown, the scoring team may choose to set up on the 5 yard line and attempt to score a second touchdown for 2 points.
• A field goal for 3 points
• A safety for 1 or 2 points.

Football differs from Rugby primarily through the downs system. Teams are divided into attackers and defenders. Each play, the attacking team sets up on the current line of scrimmage, and attempts to advance the ball. The attackers must achieve a gain of at least 10 yards in 3 downs (Canada) or 4 downs (USA). If they succeed, the down count is reset to 1 and they remain on attack during the next play. If they fail, they hand the ball to the current defenders and the role of attacking team and defending team swaps.

During each play, the following options are available:

• The attacking team may throw the ball forward one time.
• They may throw the ball backward as many times as they wish.
• They may hand-off the ball to another player as many times as they like.
• They may surrender control of the ball by kicking it down the field. If they are not attempting to score a field goal, this play is called a punt.

When a touchdown is scored, the scoring team becomes the defenders (if they weren't already) and the scored-on team becomes the attackers (ditto).

The American and Canadian games share all of the above features, but differ in the following ways. Changes made by the Americans in 1912 are marked in bold:

• In the Canadian game, the attacker has 3 downs to gain 10 yards. In the American game, they have 4 downs to gain 10 yards.
• The Canadian field is 110 yards by 60 yards, for a total play surface of 7150 square yards. The American field is 100 yards by 53.333 yards, for a total play surface of 5333.333 square yards. Canadian endzones are also twice as long at 20 yards to America's 10. Diagrams of the fields side by side are given below:
• Canadian teams may have 12 players on the field at one time, American teams may have 11.
• Canadian teams may kick as many times as they want in a play from anywhere on the field, although only the first kick can score a field goal. American teams are allowed 1 kick per play and must kick from behind the line of scrimmage. The defenders may never kick the ball intentionally in American football, but defenders can (and do!) punt the ball back in Canadian football to avoid a Rouge.
• Canadian teams may score a single point by kicking the ball through or in to the other team's end-zone. See Rouge in the glossary.
• Canadian punt-returners – the players responsible for catching and fielding a punt – must be given a 5 yard halo until the ball lands. Violating this halo causes a foul (see flag). This is because either team can recover a punt in Canadian football! In American football, this requirement does not exist because a punting team may not recover the ball on the same play except via fumble recovery.
  • In order for the attackers to recover their own punt, a play referred to as the onside punt or trick punt, the ball must be kicked from behind the line of scrimmage and recovered by a player who was standing behind the kicker when the ball was kicked. This play is not allowed in American football. In the event an onside punt is successfully recovered, the down count is reset even if less than 10 yards have been gained.
• A defending team receiving a punt in Canadian football is entitled to one forward pass during the play. This was recently outlawed in American Football.
• American football players may avoid returning a punt or kickoff by waving for a fair catch or kneeling in their own endzone for a touchback. This is not allowed in Canadian football, as all kicks must be fielded.
• In Canadian football, the attacking team must return to the line of scrimmage and start the next play within 20 seconds of the previous play being blown dead. In American football, the attacking team has 45 seconds to start the next play.
• The clock is paused between plays in Canadian football in the last 3 minutes of each half, while in American football timer constantly runs regardless of current game clock.
• In American football, the waggle is banned, while in Canada it is allowed.

3. Why do I like the Canadian rules more?

The changes made to the American rules in 1912 were intended to make the game more offensively focused and therefore more interesting. There is a saying in football strategy: “Offense sells tickets. Defense wins championships.” The point of this proverb is that the fans love Quarterbacks and Wide Receivers much more than they like Defensive Backs and Linebackers. Offensive plays are cooler and more exciting than defensive plays. The goal of a football team is to sell tickets and the goal of a football fan is to have fun watching football, so increasing the game's average offensive output is an admirable goal. Unfortunately, the changes made by the American rules have had the opposite of the intended effect.

On average, a pro football game in Canada sees 50.3 points scored, 528.6 passing yards thrown, and 199.9 rushing yards for a total average of 728.5 yards of gross offense. In an NFL game, the average points scored is a measly 46.0, passing yards is held to a mere 437.0, but rushing yards are much higher at 243.2 for an average gross offense of 680.2. (Stats as of 2023)

But why? NFL defenders (who almost universally have never watched a CFL game) will tell you that the CFL is a punt fest! 3 downs is not enough to advance the football! WRONG. 3 downs is the perfect amount and 4 downs slows the game down significantly. Consider the following basic math: a CFL offense must gain an average of 5 yards per play (as they usually punt on 3rd down). An NFL offense must gain an average of 3.334 yards per play before punting. Combine that with the following statistics: the average number of yards gained by a rush play is 4 and the average number of yards gained by a successful pass is 8. Do you see where this leads? With 4 downs, NFL teams are able to run chunk play books with short yard gains every play and barely any passing, because they can expect to advance 12 yards in the 3 safe downs they have before the 4th down punt. Meanwhile, CFL teams are forced to throw electrifying long bombs on every possession!

The gasping desperate NFL fan when presented with these basic facts tries one last gambit: kicking is boring and the CFL has too much kicking! Sure, there are twice as many punts in a CFL game on average (18 vs 8), but first of all, it's called FOOTball so there should be lots of kicking and second of all kicking would not be boring if the 1912 rule changes hadn't made it boring. Canadian kicking is wild and entertaining. The onside punt – a banned play south of the border – makes any punt attempt potentially as exhilarating as an onside kick attempt. Onside kicks and punts in Canadian football are allowed to be trick plays while the onside kick – the only interesting kicking play allowed in the NFL – has been neutered with the latest rule changes made by the No Fun League. Furthermore, the much maligned Rouge leads to Rugby Union style back and forth kicks that are always a treat to see. To make matters worse, the NFL seems determined to make the American kicking game even more boring. Over the years, they have banned seemingly every fun outcome of kicking. Punt returners are no longer allowed to forward pass, punts must occur behind the line of scrimmage, only one kick is allowed per play, kicks don't even need to be returned (see touchback and fair catch), and so on and so on. At some point, why not just get rid of kicks entirely and rename the American game “Handball?”

The worst American innovation of all has been the 45 second play clock and lack of clock pause at the end of the half. This creates two perverse incentives. American players use the full 45 second down time, eating up clock and leading to less average “real” play time per game. The lack of pause between plays in the last 3 minutes of the half mean that if the team ahead in points gains possession of the ball with less than 2 minutes remaining, they are able to simply delay the game until the clock runs out. The NFL averages as little as 11 minutes of live-ball time over a full 60 minute game! Meanwhile in the CFL, once play is blown dead the players have a mere 20 seconds to rush back to the line and set up the next play. On top of that, in the last 3 minutes of each half, the clock is paused when the ball is blown dead, which has completely eliminated stalling from the Canadian game and allowed incredible comebacks on a regular basis. These two factors lead to more live-play in the CFL.

4. It just means more.

There are reasons beyond the objective as to why I love Canadian Football more than American Football. When put together that reason can be summed up with the word SOVL. Before you continue reading, please watch the following video: CFL | This Is Our League

Why do I love the CFL? Because I live in Canada. I like the Buffalo Bills, but I will never go to a Bills game without shelling out hundreds of American dollars. For $40 last August, I had field side tickets in a packed TD Place cheering on the Ottawa REDBLACKS (and yes, the team's name is officially all-caps). I watched Damon Webb return an 85 yard pick 6 and I saw our rival Argos get dumpstered live. The CFL teams represent my home in a way no NFL team ever can.

Advertising in NFL games is also unbearably atrocious. The average NFL game and American NCAA game has more than 3 hours of advertising! Meanwhile, the CFL offers a free ad-free streaming service called CFL+ available for all fans outside of the TSN coverage area (and easily accessibly be VPN which they don't bother blocking). The CFL wants you to watch football. The NFL wants you to watch Subway commercials.

The strongest argument for the NFL is the athleticism of the players. What honest football fan doesn't love Josh Allen's rushing attack, the Minneapolis Miracle, or Saquon Barkley's backwards hurdle? The NFL has these players because there is more money in the NFL than the CFL. There is more money in the NFL because most Canadians don't care about football while most Americans do – plus there's 10 times as many of them as there are of us. Even if every Torontonian was a double-blue diehard, we couldn't possibly afford a player like Tom Brady. The yet-to-be-born GOAT football player will never play in the CFL.

But that doesn't matter. The Americans who play in the CFL for our entertainment love football so much they're willing to move to another country, learn a different (but better!) set of rules, and potentially get life-altering brain damage for the chance to suit up in a pro game. The Canadians who play in the CFL instead of the NFL (and there are some who choose that, see Nathan Rourke) play here because this country is their home. The CFL has an incredibly passionate fan-base, but to the players the CFL is the league that gave them a chance at greatness, a chance to play for their home team, and a chance to play football as it was meant to be played.

Also fuck soccer.

Glossary

• Interception: if the defending team catches a pass thrown by the attacking Quarterback, the defending team gains possession and immediately becomes the attacking team.
• Fair catch: in order to avoid being tackled by an incoming player from the kicking team, a receiver may wave to signal that play should be blown dead as soon as the ball is caught or hits the ground. This rule only exists in American football. In Canadian football, the ball must always be fielded unless penalty occurs during the kickoff.
• Field goal: a method of scoring worth 3 points where the attacking team successfully kicks the ball through the other team's uprights.
• Flag: a yellow cloth carried by football referees on their belts. Detached and thrown when the referee spots foul play.^1
• Fumble: if a player carrying the ball loses possession of the ball for any reason (drops it or has it knocked out of his hands), either team may pick up the ball and take possession of it.
• Line of Scrimmage: the line of scrimmage is the most forward crossing line on the field reached by a ball carrier on the attacking side during this drive. When play is blown dead, it resumes from this line.
• Pick-6: A “pick-6” is the unofficial term for an interception by the defending team that is carried all the way back to the attacking team's endzone, scoring a touchdown for the defenders.
• Rouge: if the ball is kicked in to or through the other team's end zone by the kicking team without the receiving team advancing it out of their endzone, the kicking team receives one point. This may happen any time, and the receiving team is allowed to avoid it by punting the ball back to the original kicking team. This rules only exists in Canadian football, having been removed from the American game in 1912.
• Rushing: rushing attack refers to a method of gaining yards that does not involve forward passing. Teams specializing in rushing attack prioritize breaking through the other team's line in order to allow a player called a Running Back to carry the ball the required 10 yards.
• Safety: a safety is a rare way of scoring points in both games. If a player on a team is tackled in their own endzone while holding the ball, the defending team receives 2 points. Alternatively, if a two point conversion is attempted and an interception or fumble occurs, the defending team may pick up the ball and attempt to score a touchdown. If the defenders manage to do this, they score a “1 point safety.” There has never been a successful 1 point safety in the history of pro football, although it has occurred at the collegiate level.
• Touchdown: a method of scoring worth 6 points where either team carries the ball across the line separating the play field from the other team's endzone without going out of bounds.^2
• Touchback: if the ball is kicked into the other team's endzone, the receiving team may recover the ball and kneel out the play. This rule only exists in American football. If a CFL player tries to do this, they concede a Rouge.
• Uprights: the poles in the centre of the endzone of a football field.
• Waggle: the waggle refers to the charge towards the line of scrimmage made by wide receivers and running backs in Canadian football. The waggle allows attacking players to build up speed before play begins. The waggle is banned in American football.

Footnotes 1: French Canadians call this a mouchoir. Alouettes and REDBLACKS fans will often shout “Mouchoir!” when a flag is thrown in reference to this, whether they are French or English fans. 2: French Canadians often refer to touchdowns as majeurs. As a result, some English fans refer to touchdowns as major scores in reference to this.

I am redeeming myself from the little I have read last month, and for the first time, we are starting with a compilation of poetry and prose:

If I Must Die – Refaat Alareer

For once, I'll talk about the author before moving on to the book. Refaat Alareer was a Palestinian professor who taught literature and creative in University in Gaza. He was critical of the israelian genocide of the Palestinian people (shocker), and wrote about it, leading to his murdered on December 6th 2023 by Israel, who targeted his residential building with an airstrike killing other civilians with him, including his sister, brother and nephews.

It is pretty clear-cut that Israel is committing genocide over there with the full support of the US and the complicity (even if sometimes by way of inaction) of many other western nations. There is nothing I can say that hasn't already been said a thousand times better, so this is as much as I'll comment. If you are looking to do your own research (which you should) please beware of the pervasive zionist propaganda in our western medias. The lies and gaslighting are prevalent, and so are attempts at manufacturing consent.

The book is a collection of writings about Pr. Alareer's life in Gaza and his thought on the israelian genocide, interspaced by poems. I will admit that I do not have the greatest sensibility for poetry, and it may have been lost on me, but the writings were really something. He was already saying how the situation is crazy and inhumane in 2014, and 2021, but his more recent writing say that what's been happening since 2023 is way worse than what they've experienced those years. He shows through his writing how untenable the situation is for him and his family. But the real situation for the average Gazan is much worse than what he puts on paper, as he says himself that he is in a very privileged position, with money, access to the internet and not being an anonymous Palestinian face.

He is very candid about his thoughts and what he thinks are his shortcomings about protecting his family and raising his children in this environment, it was very moving.

Babel – R.F. Kuang

I had previously read Yellowface, another book by R.F. Kuang and really didn't care for it. It was entertaining, but I found the characters to not be consistent or even make sense and the story not be and to make as well. I brushed it off as it being a side project of a different calibre, when the author's claim to fame is her fantasy book, like Babel. I was very charitable. But not anymore.

I was thoroughly disappointed with Babel. While I gave Yellowface the benefit of the doubt, this will not get a pass. There is so much wrong with this book, I don't understand all the praise it gets. The world building is atrocious, and I wouldn't dare even calling it worldbuilding — there's nothing. The setting is regular 19th century earth with magic runes in it, basically. Those runes can almost do anything, as long as you can find the right words for it. With this monumental change in the way the world works, you would think world events would have unfolded differently, but no. The world is the exact same, it's lazy and boring. At first, I thought in the book that the runes had been recently discovered, justifying the fact that everything just evolved the same way until the 19th century. But it is revealed later in the books that the Romans discovered the runes and how to use them; and the world didn't substantially change for all 2000+ years with this discovery!? Then, let's talk about the magic system. The silver rune thing is a seemingly interesting concept, but it is so underutilised and inconsistent. Even if its functioning and the functioning of specific runes is also explained ad nauseam. The writing as a whole is very repetitive and the 'themes' are really ham-fisted. The fact that they are also very, very surface level, while being discussed non-stop, was also annoying. It is also not saying anything very interesting about them. What really did me in is at the end when the leader of the union is like: “you realise it's about class, right” and our main protagonist is like “yes I do now” which makes no sense as this whole time they had only been focused on race and colonialism and after this little dialogue, the book picks back up with the main character solely focusing on race and colonialism. Speaking of our main character, he is such a serpillère, always being pushed toward something and having zero agency. He is so passive and the whole time he doesn't really move things forwards, he's just barely reacting to things just happening. The rest of the cast is somehow worse, and are just one-dimensional caricatures. Nothing is meaningful about them, they have zero personality, and we are told about how they are such interesting and diverse characters, but we are never shown anything. The “family” that was built at Oxford doesn't feel genuine and organic. And how can I forget about the footnotes — they are utterly useless. They do not make sense in the context of the story as this is not a text found and annotated by a historian or someone after the fact, or a journal, and they are literally just full of stuff that should have been cut out. I feel like during the editing process, whenever a section of the book was asked to be removed, it was instead turned into a footnote. They are not consistent in their tone and what they are saying; at one point it's to clarify a reference to a real world historical event, sometimes it's about a historical event in the fictional world and then sometimes it's about some truly meaningless piece of detail about one of the characters. The only redeeming quality of the book is that it is consumable; it's a very easy read. But not an interesting one and barely an entertaining one.

The Road – Cormac McCarthy

An apocalyptic event happened, most life on earth is extinct, including plants. We follow a father and his kid trying to survive the aftermath.

I had seen this book recommended by a couple of people in the bookclub group chat, which ironically enough is rarely talking about books, and saw that it was available at the library. The prose was initially very distracting and off-putting, but once it clicked that it was part of the experience™ I was able to enjoy my reading. It's kinda like in L'Étranger (The Stranger) — I don't know how well it was translated in english — but in french the prose is very particular and peculiar on purpose. The Road is definitely not for everyone but I really liked it. I found refreshing that this was a truly a tragedy of everyday life — there might be smalls ups but it doesn't distract (and even further reinforces) the hardships and struggles of day to day living. There is no light at the end of the tunnel, there is no hope, life is just objectively unbearable. Good little book.

Brave New World Revisited – Aldous Huxley

Guess who's back... After my presentation at theory night, I had acquired the last bit of motivation needed to finally finish the article about this book. However, I got some pertinent questions from the gang and I had to revamp the article a bit to address those. The article will have come out before this (it's here!), so I can now promise it is the last time I count this as a reading. (I do not wish to read this book a seventh time, believe me)

A Game of Thrones – George R.R. Martin

You all know what this is, so there is no need for a synopsis. I had seen the show when it came out with my parents (horrible parenting, I know, I was only 12 years old). We all know how it turned out, but I had heard the books were goated. The world building is good, the dialogues are good as well, and the characters are great. They have their own personality and motivation and act accordingly. Every POV of the book is interesting, and it is also great to see the conflict from different angles and how each influence the other POVs. The only little issue I have is with the writing sometimes — when a character is witty, it feels a bit too forced how other characters are gobsmacked or lose their tongue. Another thing is the antiquated “man writes woman” that appear mostly in the Daenerys chapters. The books have been written in the late 90's, so I'm sure the sensibilities were different, and I'm just thankful it wasn't much, much worse, which it could easily have been.

Grappler BAKI – Keisuke Itagaki

Underground Arena Saga – Chapters 1-77

What the- If any of you are familiar with BAKI, I don't need to explain to you how insane it is. For the blessed others, BAKI is a fighting manga where people just duke it out using ancestral or extremely rare techniques that are always “backed up” by scientific reasoning (which never makes a lick of sense). For instance, one character's defence is impenetrable because he learned to move his eye independently like a chameleon. Or some techniques are just stupid as hell, and they are never consistent in universe. Like one character is doing the “unstoppable force” advance that cannot be stopped by anything in the world, but then the opponent one is using the “immovable object” stance which cannot be moved under any circumstance. It is absolutely beyond idiotic, and I love it. The only issue I would have is the beginning of this manga, the flow of movement is kinda hard to read, and it is not helped that fighters are doing things that almost defy physics.

There is also no official translation for this, so you have to rely on fan one, and the most readily available one is from the wildfang project (actually just one guy) who not only doesn't speak japanese and only “translated” by using context clues in the drawings, but after a while he starts to change the plot just because he doesn't like this or that thing. Dodging this translation was a nightmare, but I thankfully could try to find a version in either french or italian (turns out it was a mexican flag and not an italian one) for the chapters that we only available through that horrendous wildfang translation.

I'm thinking we're back. Some good reads overall, and some not so good, but I have read. I'd like to get back to some reading in a language other than english very soon, as — it might sound weird to say — I'm growing bored of it. I'll try to sneak in a bit of french or maybe a cheeky ukrainian book in there. There will probably be a couple less books next month as I am away to Japan, and also have to prepare my feminist theory presentation.

Thank you for reading my logorrhea Eddie – Award winning author

Forewords

In a previous book report, July Readings (2024), I had mentioned that the discussion on Aldous Huxley's essay Brave New World Revisited was to come out in a standalone article. This is it. For those unaware, Brave New World is a dystopian novel that came out in 1932, and while at the time not pretending to be prophetic, its author — Aldous Huxley — wrote an essay in 1958 taking a look back on the thirty years since its publication. The gist of his essay is that the world is sliding down dystopia way faster than he had anticipated, and he was right about a lot of things. I never jot down notes or do any highlighting/bookmarking when reading a book, but some of the things said in this essay were so outlandish that I couldn't refrain myself. I knew that I would want to share my findings with the good people of the printhouse. This however is not a proper rigorous critique; I'll just go through what I wrote down, whether it be quotes, paraphrases, and comment on it, and inserting my own biases. This was also reworked after my presentation at Theory Night earlier this year, I thank all who attended for their valuable questions and remarks which have helped reshape this garbage.

Do not let this man cook

We'll first look at the statements that may have not aged well, were straight-up wrong from the get-go, or were fucking insane:

“Overpopulation is the greatest threat humanity will have to face in the coming centuries”

This doesn't come out of nowhere, but it is funny to see how off the mark it is. Especially since recently some people have started to talk about how much of an issue population decline/aging is becoming. To be fair, he wasn't the only one to think that overpopulation was gonna become a problem. The reasoning sounded almost sound at the time if you oversimplified the problem and made (wrong) assumptions; we have limited resources on the planet, and more and more people living on it could put a strain on those resources. To add to that, not only are people having more and more children, but advances in technology make it so they all just don't die after a year or so. Likewise, having the shits will not bring anyone to an early grave anymore, reducing the rate at which population declines. But the reality is that overpopulation is a myth that was debunked even before he wrote this, as the planet can easily host many more billions of us since production increase is not linear — as long as we pull the reins on our crazy overconsumption. Furthermore, many countries have experienced a dramatic fall in their birth rates, and many world population models — however accurate they may be — are predicting a significant reduction in population growth rate, with the median in projection having a plateau between 10 and 11 billion humans worldwide. This brings us to our second point:

“Countries that will become overpopulated will turn toward communism”

The direct quote from the book is “It is a pretty safe bet that, 20 years from now [so in 1978], all the world's overpopulated and underdeveloped countries will be under some form of totalitarian rule — probably by the communist party “(Chp I, p.13) Does this come out of nowhere? Kinda. Here ol'boy Huxley is still convinced that overpopulation is the main issue that we will face, and that the strain on resources will bring about great economic hardship. This will lead governments of the countries most affected to step in more and more into the economy and impede more and more on the individual freedom of its citizen (for instance with rationing). All of this, Huxley says, will also create civil unrest whether simple political unrest of full on open rebellion. The government of those countries will then have to step in to secure their authority, and thus will concentrate more and more power in the hands of a few. Basically the government of overpopulated countries will have to become centralised and authoritative. Now I heard you wondering — where does communism come into play? Well for the ol'boy, a central authoritative government is Communism! Forget all your political theories and talks about fake concepts like “class”, “labour” and “capital”; communism is just when a government is central and is authoritarian/totalitarian!

“With advances in medicine, the ill will get to reproduce, and that's bad” & “With technological advances, stupid people will get the chance to reproduce, and that's bad”

Basically, Aldous (we're on a first name basis) argues that the general population will get sicker, and more stupid as times goes on, because some people that would otherwise have died by natural causes or by the result of their own stupidity will get to reproduce. This whole chapter was very yucky to read and oozes of eugenics. He talks about children born with any hereditary genetic “defects” as being separate from humankind. He says that the way we go about breeding is “contaminating the genetic pool”. I will just quote a sentence to give you an idea of how bad this is: “And what about the congenitally deficient organisms whom our medicine and social services now preserve so that they may propagate their kind”(Chp II, p.21). At the end of the chapter, he says that for humanity to survive, we will need to find a middle ground between full-blown eugenics, and an ethical solution to this “issue”. Getting back to the issue at hand, Aldous is wrong. We can manage most hereditary disease/“defect” much better than in the olden days, so there is no danger for the human race as a whole. As for intelligence, since we have been recording populations general IQ scores, they overall have been steadily rising. In fact, every time we change the IQ test, we normalise the results to have the average at 100 and a standard deviation of 15-16 IQ points. Populations taking older IQ tests do score on average above 100. _{that is until recently but the decline is thought to be environmentally caused, i.e. not to be hereditary, so he's still wrong.}

“Saving people from malaria was bad, actually”

A combination of the two above arguments, overpopulation bad, so saving people from mass-killing disease is ultimately bad. This kinda comes out of nowhere. In his eugenics chapter, he is basically just taking an example of what looks good but is actually bad because it worsens the “issue” of overpopulation. He says that the populations affected by malaria cannot adequately clothe, educate and feed themselves, and if you read between the lines, that a quick death by malaria would have been more merciful. Needless to say that a 100 Hitlers are saying: “WE AGREE”.

“Society will tend to move towards uniformity and de-individualisation”

This is a very weird and confusing arguments that is spread over 10 pages and makes very little sense. He basically says that because government try to organise themselves, and tend to over-organise, this will lead them to seek to organise humans too, and use social engineers to this end, and in the 21st century to start using “World controller” (Just like in Brave New World). His whole rant also encompasses apples, Newton, packs of elephants, medieval guilds, religion, termites, 1984, Brave New World, Jesus, Mao, Mussolini... My man is all over the place and jumps from one topic from another without making much sense. He doesn't really define uniformity and de-individualisation, but he has this sentence of what he thinks society will slide toward: “This ideal man is the man who displays 'dynamic conformity' (delicious phrase!) and an intense loyalty to the group, an unflagging desire to subordinate himself, to belong.” (Chp 3, p.33) This is so wrong it's not even funny. In more than one way, we are still far from uniformity in society. One thing that I think has made the need to blend in and conform almost irrelevant is the internet. It is now easier than ever to find some weirdoes online that have the same interests as you. You don't have to conform to a very specific set of rules for your whole life anymore, out of fear of being ostracised by the town. Don't get me wrong, there are still institutions such as school, work... where you do have to conform to certain social norms, and there are also social norms to adhere to when interacting with others, but that was true (and maybe even truer) during Aldous' time. With this I'm trying to say there is less uniformity in the way we can be and the way we interact with others nowadays than before and we have to conform less. As far as the comment on “the group” most will recognise that there is less and less emphasis nowadays on the community and more on the individual, as large communities or group have for the most part been completely atomised. To take one example, unless you have grown up in your current neighbourhood, I would wager that you barely know your neighbours and do not willingly interact with them on a daily basis. Nor would you recognise yourself as part of the group labelled “neighbourhood” and have an “unflagging desire [...] to belong” to that group. We less and less think of ourselves as parts of groups, and more as individuals, and we value our individuality dearly. We therefore do not really care about conforming to those group/communities or desire to subordinate ourselves either. Therefore, I think Aldous' claim that we are moving towards uniformity and de-individualisation is wrong. I won't stay on this topic too long, because I would actually have to do some thinking to go below surface-level, and we also have other arguments to go through. (also I'm lazy)

“Tranquilisers are great and their benefits far outweigh their side effects”

Aldous here is eager to find a parallel between soma (the drug in Brave New World that everybody takes and is akin to a tranquilizer) and what's happening in the real world, because he is a visionary and everything that he wrote about will come true. So he makes the point that as a society we are also moving towards using tranquilizers willy-nilly. But it's fine he says, because many new compounds are without major side effects, and just like soma, we will be able to take them without complications. He gives a list of the “promising compounds”. I googled each and every one of them and the first sentence on wikipedia was usually something like “Diamosophoseraprophrol was taken off the market in 1961 because additional research showed it had no beneficial effects beyond placebo and caused AIDS on top of ass cancer and impotence (even in women)” Another L for Aldous.

“Inception is real and subliminal messages can work”

Do I even need to comment on that? Seriously, proof that they work, and certainly by 'they' I do mean inception and subliminal messages₉ is |itera11y non-existent.

Wait, actually maybe let's let him cook a little...

There aren't just some laughably bad takes in here, and my man Aldous sometime has something interesting things to say:

“Advances in technology lead to Big Business...”

The crux of the argument is this: advances in technology allow us to have more and more complex machinery to produce such and such product or service. Those advances also allow us to expand a business' operating range. Since the new complex machinery is more expensive, and we can service more people far away from us, this will lead to centralisation. It is cheaper to have one big company servicing let's say the whole province or even multiple provinces, rather than multiple companies doing it. That big company also doesn't want any competition, since mass production requires mass distribution, therefore they do anything in their power to shut down the little companies. Couple that with the fact that the technologically advanced machinery is out of reach of those littles companies, due to cost, maintenance, availability, skilled operator availability... and they cannot compete with the big guys. Therefore, Big Business. The reasoning is sound, with Aldous detailing the process that he sees happening in his time, and that will continue to happen — and maybe worsen — according to him. And even if technological advances also bring about democratisation, which Aldous did not foresee, a smaller company being eaten by the Goliath of the industry is anything but an unfamiliar story nowadays. I will count this as a W for Aldous... but I will immediately temper it because of the below: Does Aldous think this is bad? Yes, as he hates centralisation and thinks that, as usual, the solution to anything is the middle ground, this middle ground being in between absolute laissez-faire — which allows the Big Businesses to gobble up everything — and total control — which he doesn't explain entails.

“There is a problem with media ownership”

Here Aldous employs the same reasoning as with the industry and technological advances; that all the small time papers have been gobbled up by the big boys. Similarly, mass communication requires mass distribution, meaning that the few opinions of the big boy journals will be read by the masses. This power would be attracting the Power Elite. The Power Elite is, in a capitalist society, the owners of the Big Businesses. This Power Elite will strive to be the owner of the journals, and use them to their own ends “influencing the though, feelings and actions of virtually everybody”(Chp III, p.27). He says that Big Media is neither good or bad, but a tool. And he think this tool is not being used to its true purpose, which is to inform, by its owner. Most big news papers/agencies are still owned by billionaires or massive corporations (themselves often owned by billionaires), so it is sad to see that the world has not improved in this regard. Just look at the way the recent talk on the change of the Capital gain tax in Canada [can you tell I started writing this a year ago 🙃] were handled, and you will have a prime example of the news working to disinform the public and work against their interest, but to the benefit of the richest. Couple that with the fact that a sizable amount of people nowadays read the news as a mean of distraction, and entertainment, and not truly to be informed, and you basically get the argument that Aldous was trying to make. Well, not totally, I think Aldous falls short in his analysis. His thesis about the media in the West boils down to: “The Power Elite owns the media, and they don't use it to inform. They are not concerned about saying true or false things, but about distracting the people, and drowning them in a sea of irrelevance to sell the most papers as possible”. To Aldous, information is capital to the wellbeing of a democracy, and the media is not concerned about that anymore which is an issue. I agree, and that's why we're in the “maybe he was cooking section”. Where I think it falls short is that — as far as I understood it — he thinks there is no nefarious goal by the owners of the media to undermine information and democracy, they are just giving the people what they want, distractions, to get their bag. On the contrary, I believe that there is a conscious effort by the media owners — those billionaires, and gargantuan companies — to use the media as a tool of propaganda to further their own goals and protect their interests. This also includes making sure the working class is not actively looking out for what's in their best interest. Funnily enough, I would almost say the owners of the media use it the way Aldous describe dictators using it: “In their propaganda today's dictators rely for the most part on repetition, suppression and rationalization – the repetition of catchwords which they wish to be accepted as true, the suppression of facts which they wish to be ignored, the arousal and rationalization of passions which may be used in the interests of the Party or the State.“(Chp III, p.48). Could we be living in a dictatorship of the capital?

Maybe I've played too much Disco Elysium and I need to touch grass, but what I'm trying to say is: “The mass media is basically used as a propaganda tool to defend the interests of the capital owners, and to actively prevent the working class from organising themselves and working towards their own betterment.”

“The new order of things leads to decreasing mental health”

This one is mostly quotes from Dr. Fromm, a philosopher and sociologist of the time (not a nazi or zionist, I checked), and is even more relevant today than it was 70 years ago.

“Our contemporary Western society [...] is increasingly less conductive to mental health and tends to undermine the inner security happiness, reason and the capacity for love in the individuals; it tends to reduce [them] into an automaton who pays for his human failure with increasing mental sickness, and with despair hidden under a frantic drive for work and so-called pleasure.”(Chp III, p.27)

He also says that, paraphrasing: these mental symptoms are not our enemy, but the best indication we have that the way things are running right now our incompatible with mental health and our overall happiness. Aldous uses it to push for his argumentation, which is less relevant and not that interesting to me, but I wanted to share the writing from Dr. Fromm. Entering the workforce, especially as another cog in the corporate machine, I did feel my mental health declining, my happiness too, and saw myself increasingly yearning for distractions. It is only in taking a step back from work, bettering my work-life balance, and climbing out of the productivity trap that I saw an improvement. Serene and contemplative life is not easily conciliable with our current capitalist system, but it is without a doubt healthier.

“Given a fair chance, people will choose to govern themselves and will govern themselves better than they can be governed by entities independent of their will.”

Basically here Huxley's saying that people, given a fair chance, will choose to have democracy, and that democracy is better (albeit maybe not optimally more efficient) than any form of dictatorship. His reasoning? It's human nature. His quote is: “In spite of the Id and the Unconscious, in spite of endemic neurosis and the prevalence of low IQ's, most men and women are probably decent enough and sensible enough to be trusted with the direction of their own destinies.”(Chp IV, p.41) Of course, there is the caveat of the fair chance. It is not defined supremely well (or well at all) by Huxley, but basically the fair chance is achieved when there have been good historical and technological condition, when society is stable, when the average individual has decent economic conditions and access to information, and when there are good demographic condition. Aldous defines none of them, and I don't really want to know what he means by “good historical and demographic” condition, but I can imagine. In any case, I think he's directionally right, so that's why it's in this section. Call me naïve, but I think humans are generally ok, when they're not struggling and are generally secure socially and financially. I had a ~1000 word bit about this in my previous draft, but I think the above sentence summarises my views pretty well. I also think that — hot take — people self-governing using democracy or the likes (for instance with the café's much beloved sortition) is better than its opposite.

Unfortunately, for Aldous democracy == (British) Liberalism so he's only partially right. And by “good historical and demographic” conditions, I have the feeling he might be doing a racism with a zest of eugenics. He also says that the fair chance is being taken away from us little by little, first because he's still raving about overpopulation, but also because he says we're loosing access to good info (see his point about the media above). I've elected to only include his first bit of reasoning for this because I was lacking things to put in the “he's cooking a bit” category.

Conclusion

In many ways, the work of a critic is easy. We risk very little, yet enjoy a position over those who offer up their work and their selves to our judgment. We thrive on negative criticism, which is fun to write and to read. But the bitter truth we critics must face, is that in the grand scheme of things, the average piece of junk is probably more meaningful than our criticism designating it so. But there are times when a critic truly risks something, and that is in the discovery and defence of a eugenics apologist. The world is often unkind to eugenics apologists. The eugenics apologist needs friends. Last year, I experienced something new: an half-burnt meal from a singularly unexpected source (a eugenics apologist). To say that both the meal and its maker have challenged my preconceptions about fine cooking is wrong. Neither have they rocked me to my core. In the past, I have made no secret of my disdain for Chef Gusteau's famous motto, “Anyone can cook.” But I realize, only now do I truly understand what he meant. Not everyone can become a great artist; but a great artist can come from anywhere. It is easy to imagine more humble origins than those of the eugenics apologists now cooking at Huxley's, who is, in this critic's opinion, nothing more than a eugenics apologists that wrote a famous book. I will never be returning to Huxley's, hungry for more.

It's a nice exercise to really dive into a book, and dissect it rather than consuming it blindly. It's something that I will try to do more often and not just for books. Interfacing with works on a deeper level rocks. Brave New World Revisited was an excuse for Aldous to comment on the world at the time, and he piggybacked off the success of his novel to reach a wider audience. I think the parts where he equates things from Brave New World to some facets of his contemporary world are the weakest part of the essay, and also makes it more confusing. I think you have gotten the chance to get a feel for what Aldous Huxley was putting down anyways — even if you haven't read Brave New World. While he is very wrong in his assessment of scientific subjects, medicine, sociology, politics, economics... he is sometimes, although rarely, spitting a bit. But he is mostly wrong, probably at least semi-racist, a red-scared capitalist lapdog and a eugenics apologist. So L+ratio+kill yourself.

Thank you for reading my logorrhea, Eddie – Award winning author

February

This month I read 3 ebooks and 1 physical book from the Toronto Public Library, totalling to 4 books (my worst month to date). My average star rating for the month was 2.88. My running total of books read in 2025 is 11, so I am 11% of the way to my goal of reading 100 books in 2025.

Dandelion by Jaime Chai Lun Yiew

Synopsis: When Lily was 11-years-old, growing up in the British Columbia interior in 1987, her mother Swee Hua left one day and never returned. Swee Hua was miserable living in a white-majority mining town, and longed to return to Brunei. But everyone was shocked when she never wrote, never visited, never contacted her husband or her daughters. 30 years later, pregnant with her first child, Lily cannot stop thinking about her mother. Determined to figure it out, once and for all, she visits her family in Brunei. But will she like the truth that she finds out?

My thoughts: This is probably one of the only pure-fiction books that I’ve ever read that felt like a biography. Partially because I’ve been reading a couple of biographies (girl who’s only ever read biographies thinks that everything is a biography). But mostly because of the writing style of the book. It just felt so much like the author was recounting things that happened to her in her childhood, and then alternating with her perspective in the present. Also, because the plot didn’t feel like it was structured in a traditional way; it didn’t feel like there was a rising action, a third act conflict, etc etc. Usually you’d only find this when you’re reading a true story, because readers will know that real life doesn’t often follow the classic structure of a novel. This is one of the Canada Reads picks for 2025, and it’s definitely outside of my normal reading, so I’m glad to have been pushed outside of my normal taste in books, especially with the discussion of stateless people. The main character’s father was born in Brunei of Chinese descent, and was stateless, while her mother claimed to have had Malaysian citizenship. Growing up in a jus soli/birthright citizenship country, it feels so foreign to read about people who just don’t have citizenship to any country, despite being born in one, and to read about the helplessness and insecurity that they had to deal with.

Rating: 2.5/5 community meals at your local community chinese restaurant.

Title Score: C (dandelions were symbolically present at the very beginning and end of the book, but it did seem forced)

Watch Out For Her by Samantha M. Bailey

Synopsis: Sarah Goldman is determined to make a fresh start in Toronto with her family. She doesn’t want to think about Holly Monroe. Ostensibly, Holly was hired to babysit her son Jacob over the summer, but she quickly wormed her way into the Goldman’s lives. She moved in with them, started giving Sarah advice, and even getting to know Sarah’s husband, Daniel. But Holly went too far too fast, and Sarah jumped at the chance to move to Toronto for Daniel’s new job. Now she’s stuck in a new city with no family or friends, in a creepy old house with hidden cameras and a suspicious neighbourhood watch. But Sarah has no need to worry; according to the creepy texts from the unknown number, she’s never truly alone.

My thoughts: I’m always a little surprised when a genre fiction book is chosen for Canada Reads, and I was especially surprised by this one because it just wasn’t very good. I suppose it was interesting to read from Sarah’s perspective and experience the dramatic irony of a rational person reading her completely paranoid thoughts. It also was pretty weird for Holly to have some rational explanations for her behaviour, but still also be creepy and obsessed with the Goldmans.

Rating: 2/5 necklaces from exclusive Vancouver boutiques

Title Score: B (a very generic thriller title for an extremely generic thriller)

A Two-Spirit Journey: The Autobiography of a Lesbian Ojibwa-Cree Elder by Ma-Nee Chacaby with Mary Louisa Plummer

Synopsis: This is the autobiography of Ma-Nee Chacaby, an Ojibwa-Cree Elder who eventually led Thunder Bay’s first Gay Pride Parade in 2013. She was born in Ombabika, Ontario in 1952, and the book chronicles her experiences, relationships, addictions, abuse, and spiritual journey growing up and living across Northern Ontario.

My thoughts: I thought that this was a really gripping and engaging account of Ma-Nee’s life, and it was shocking to hear about all the hardships she had gone through throughout her life. But it was so amazing to watch her get knocked down (sometimes literally) but still get back up again. I was also struck by how much she had experienced at a very young age, for example she had already been married, had kids, and divorced by the time she was in her early twenties. I also really admire her for staying true to her two-spirit identity, even when other Indigenous people hated her for it (because it made their own lives more difficult. Reading the afterward made me really appreciate all the work that Mary Louisa Plummer did to turn Ma-Nee’s oral account into a book that would be easy for the reader to understand but also true to Ma-Nee’s way of speaking. I can’t speak to the latter goal, but she definitely accomplished the former. Plummer definitely treated this as an academic project (it was published by the University of Manitoba Press) and she was determined to not repeat the mistakes of similar memoirs, where the white researchers often took ownership and did not fully respect the stories of the Indigenous women they were recording.

Rating: 4/5 Women’s Music Festivals where you met your soulmate 10 years ago

Title Score: A (this is exactly what the book was about, no notes)

This Will Be Fun by E. B. Asher

Synopsis: 10 years ago, a team of heroes saved the Queendom of Mythria from a terrible darkness. There was beautiful Beatrice, prickly Elowen, ex-bandit Clare, and heroic Galwell the Great, and together they were known as the Four. But saving the queendom did not come without sacrifice, and Galwell gave his life so that his friends could survive and succeed in their mission. 10 years later, the surviving members of the Four have gone their separate ways. Beatrice married a rich but rather dull duke, and has just been divorced by him. Clare has appeared in many advertisements and sponsorships, determined to be able to pay his own way. And Elowen has retreated to a dark forest, where she hopes that no one will brave the treacherous woods in order to bother her. But the Four have been served a summons that they cannot turn down: the marriage of the former-Princess, now-Queen of Mythria to her beloved. They owe it to the Queen to show up, but will Clare, Beatrice, Elowen (and their longtime adversary Vandra) survive the journey without ripping each other’s heads off? And even worse, will they be able to save the Queendom one more time?

My thoughts: This was a lighthearted queer (and straight) romance that was basically all fluff. The magic system didn’t make a ton of sense, and the author’s focus seemed to be on parodying real life with magic as much as possible (Wagons instead of Ubers, heart-magic consultants instead of therapists, brew taverns instead of Starbucks, etc etc etc). That being said, it was still charming, and it was nice to see that Elowen x Vandra and Beatrice x Clare each repair their own relationships with their partners but also with their questmates.

Rating: 3/5 Annual Clare look-alike contests

Title Score: D (this has nothing to do with the book and a bit trite imo)

Welcome to the start of my third year of Reading Roundups! It's been such a journey to share everything that I read with you, and it's great being able to revisit some of the things I've read in the past two years with such detail.

New this year, I'm introducing another feature to my reviews: title grades! It really bothers me how some titles really do not reflect their books well at all, and I'm giving myself a platform to complain about it (or celebrate it). A, B, and C are passing grades, while D and F are failing grades, so keep an eye out for that! I'm also now on Storygraph, so if you're interested in my progress you can follow me, @elisakuhn . Hopefully I can also use some features from Storygraph to make my roundups a bit more interesting.

Cheers to three years!!!

January 2025

This month, I read 3 physical books and 4 ebooks from the Toronto Public Library, totaling to 7 books. My average star rating for the month was 3.79, dropping to 2.65 when you account for all of the DNFs. Since it's only January, my running total of books for 2025 is still just 7.

Honourable Mentions

Happy Place (reread) by Emily Henry

Synopsis: Harriet has wished for one thing all year: a week at her happy place with her best friends. Residency in San Francisco is draining and isolating, and all she really wants is a week with Sabrina and Cleo at Sabrina’s family’s cottage in Maine. But when she arrives, she received some bad news: Sabrina’s father is selling the cottage, so this will be their last summer there, ever. Even worse, her ex-boyfriend Wyn is there (except they haven’t actually told anyone that they broke up, so technically he’s still her boyfriend). Plus, there’s a tension between Sabrina and Cleo that neither wants to talk about. Is Harriet’s Happy Place gone forever?

My thoughts: I read this book in August of 2023, so I don’t think that rereading it should count as a new book for 2025. Thus, the Honourable Mention. Happy Place was actually better than I remembered. Readers will know that my top two Emily Henry books are Book Loves and Funny Story, and I had Happy Place ranked third overall but couldn’t really remember if it was that good or not. Reader, it is that good. It’s full of emotion, which is the quality that sets it apart from most of the standard romance books that I read. I highly recommend it. Now I’m wondering if People We Meet on Vacation and Beach Read are also just that good.

You would like this book if: you’re counting down the days to the next cottage weekend (and like the fake dating trope except it isn’t really fake dating).

Dishonourable Mentions

Under Lock & Skeleton Key by Gigi Pandian

Synopsis: Tempest has returned to her family home, after a humiliating accident destroyed her career as a stage magician in Las Vegas. She’s now back working for the family business, Secret Staircase Construction. But on their newest project, they discover something horrifying: Tempest’s stunt double and sworn enemy, dead. Even worse, she was discovered sealed up behind a wall that was build 50 years ago, even though Tempest saw her only weeks ago in Law Vegas. What is really going on here? Can Tempest solve the mystery and break her family’s curse?

My thoughts: I could not finish this book because I just found everything to be so silly, to the point of cringe. First of all, the main character’s birth name being Tempest is insane to me, and her stage name (Tempest of Destruction) is frankly ridiculous. She’s a magician, not a knight at a jousting tournament or something. Plus, the fact that there was a “real” curse on Tempest that she had to break somehow, especially considering that this isn’t a fantasy and all of her magic is just stage tricks.

You might like this book if: you’re sillier than I am, which I frankly find hard to believe

Ordinary Monsters by J.M. Miro

Synopsis: There is a mysterious old building in deep rural 1880s Scotland that is filled with many fantastical and horrible things, the most fascinating of which are the children. They each have their own powers: some can turn invisible, some can heal from any injury, some can manipulate dust and old skin cells, and one of them can glow. It is this last child that might be the secret to everything, but they’ll have to band together in order to keep him and themselves safe from the biggest threat they’ve ever faced: one of there own.

My thoughts: I enjoyed the first third of the book, which follows Charlie and Marlowe’s journey from America to the school in Scotland. However, I completely lost interest once it switched to Kamako’s storyline in Japan, and even once it returned back to Scotland with all four kids. I just wasn’t interested in the main conflict anymore.

You might like this book if: you enjoy being dreary and reading dreary stuff

The Stars Turned Inside Out by Nova Jacobs

Synopsis: The Large Hadron Collider at CERN has possibly the largest concentration of smart people in Europe. Unfortunately, one of their esteemed physicists has been found dead, in the bowels of the LHC itself. Dr Howard Anderby was found dead, and even worse, it seems as though he was killed by the radiation from the LHC, which wasn’t even supposed to have been operational that weekend. Private investigator Sabine Leroux has been brought in in order to figure out what exactly happened to cause such a tragedy, while fellow professor Dr Eve Marsh (who was romantically interested in Howard) launches her own investigation.

My thoughts: I thought that the combination of science and murder mystery would be a great mix, but unfortunately this book just did not hit for me. I found myself not wanting to read it, and there’s no point pushing through to read something that you don’t actually like (unless it’s for a bookclub). From the first few chapters, I got the feeling that this book was going to be primarily focused on the interpersonal relationships of all of the scientists, and none of the characters particularly endeared themselves towards me.

You might like this book if: you are an insufferable nerd

And now for...

The Real Reviews

Casket Case by Lauren Evans

Synopsis: There’s nothing left for Nora in Rabbittown, Alabama, and everyone says so. But she just can’t seem to leave after her parents death. After all, who would keep her Grandpa company, and who would run the family casket store in town? The only thing Rabbittown doesn’t have is any eligible bachelors, but who needs a boyfriend when you can watch endless tv reruns? That is, until a handsome stranger walks into her store asking for directions. His name is Garret Bishop and he works in logistics, and, amazingly, he seems interested in Nora despite all her awkwardness. He’s the perfect man, except when Nora finds out exactly what he does for a living (technically still logistics, but just for Death). How can she reconcile his job with all of the grief that she’s experienced?

My thoughts: This was a curious book in that the storyline and the concept were interesting, but the writing was incredibly boring. Everything was just too calm and plodding along, and you didn’t really get any emotion out of it until the very end. (This was kind of a reverse whiplash when compared to the really intense emotions of Happy Place). I also didn’t like how the third act developed into an Edward/Bella/Jacob style love triangle. She did choose Edward at the end, at least, but this is not something that we need in the year of our lord two thousand and twenty five.

Rating: 2.5/5 lifetime achievement awards that you have to accept on behalf of a dead person

Title Grade: C (a begrudging pass because it’s technically related to the contents of the book (Nora is a bit of a basket case, and she does run a casket store) but it’s not very good)

Blood: The Science, Medicine, and Mythology of Menstruation by Dr Jen Gunter

Synopsis: This is a very comprehensive book that covers basically everything you ever wanted to know about the menstrual cycle. It ranges from the biological mechanisms behind the menstrual cycle, birth control options and how they work, poly-cyctic ovarian syndrome and endometriosis, abortion, and much much more.

My thoughts: I think this is a great book. It’s perfect as a manual because it covers almost everything you’d want to know. It’s very comprehensive, but at the same time it’s very easy to read and understand, with the major points being helpfully summarized at the end of each chapter. The author also adds in a lot of her own personal commentary which is very relatable, and takes opportunities to refute myths going around on social media.

Rating: 5/5 mythical properties of menstrual blood that we surely would have noticed if it was real by now

Title Grade: A (Tells you exactly what the book was about, no notes)

The Examiner by Janice Hallett

Synopsis: 6 students have signed up for the new Masters of Multimedia Art at Royal Hastings University, and it’s standard procedure for an external examiner to review all of the assignments and student communications to make sure that there’s nothing hinky going on. But it turns out this master’s program is hiding a lot of secrets, and maybe even a death. Will the examiner be able to figure it all out? Or will the truth stay buried forever?

My thoughts: This book made me realize how much I miss reading epistolary novels, especially those that include other forms of media besides just letters. This book included chat messages, assignment excerpts, emails, and other things, and it was fun trying to put the pieces together. Readers will know that I am a former graduate student, and the characters hit a little bit too close to home (especially the contrast between Jem, who wanted to ace every assignment no matter the cost, and Ludya, who just wanted to finish up things with as minimal time and effort as possible). However, the characters and the plot itself was a little bit over the top. I definitely enjoyed the format more than the actual writing itself, so I’m not sure if I want to read another one of her books.

Rating: 3/5 phones that will freak out and call the police if they don’t get an accurate faceID every 5 minutes

Title Grade: B (liked how it framed the book to be about the examiner (and the reader) solving the crime, but not quite memorable enough)

Butter: A Novel of Food and Murder by Asako Yuzuki

Synopsis: Manako Kajii has captured the attention of all of Japan. She’s a notorious serial killer, or at least that’s what she’s accused of. All of her husbands have died under mysterious circumstances, leaving her to inherit thousands of dollars and attend luxury cooking classes. Every journalist, including Rika Machida, is desperate to interview Kajii before her trial starts, but she refuses to talk to anyone. That is, until Rika’s best friend suggests asking Kajii not about her alleged victims, but about the food that she cooked for them. This is the start of a cat and mouse relationship between Kajii and Rika, as Rika attempts to understand Kajii through food, and ultimately understand herself.

My thoughts: I thought this was a really well written book, although it did drag at some times. It was a lot deeper than most mystery books that I read (and it wasn’t even really a mystery), and, appropriately, I felt that it “fed” me more than others. It was very reflective, and it was interesting to watch how interacting with Kajii changed Rika’s perspectives on a lot of things (although she mainly came to her own conclusions, while Kajii became more and more obsessed with her). It’s definitely much more slow paced than any typical thriller, so don’t go into it expecting a psychological horror type vibe, but it definitely has a lot of its own merits.

Rating: 4/5 pathetic apartments that don’t even have an oven

Title Grade: A (This book is about food, but Kajii is obsessed the most with butter. She constantly tells Rika to make recipes that involve a lot of butter, and everything basically comes back to butter).

Death in the Air by Ram Murali

Synopsis: Ro Krishna has had a vexing few months. His cower (unaffectionately referred to as the Latrine) has been creating so many problems that things are impossible to ignore, and the company has instead chosen to fire him so that everything will go away. He has arranged for the Latrine to be dealt with, but in the meantime he needs something to do. His friends keep suggesting that he try Samsara, a luxurious spa for the global elite tucked away in the Indian Himalayas, and so he travels to India. He’s having an excellent time with excellent company, until one member of the group is found dead. Somehow, Ro becomes involved in the investigation, partly because everyone thinks that his background as a lawyer would be helpful, and partly because he just can’t keep himself out of trouble. As the death toll begins to climb, will Ro realize that he’s just in over his head?

My thoughts: I thought this was pretty different than most of the mysteries I’ve read lately. It was reflective, and the Samsara Spa made for a great setting (isolated, unique, and filled with characters). The writing was excellent, and it had some of the dry witty humour that readers will know I adore. There were also some cool details, like Pendy being able to guide Ro to exactly where he was meant to me, and the inclusion of two songs that played pivotal roles in the overall story, with a side-by-side of the lyrics and the action of the book. Definitely it was a breath of fresh air, and I look forward to reading anything else that Ram Murali writes.

Rating: 5/5 recurring nightmares about your car being sabotaged that are surely just nightmares and not anything to really worry about

Title Grade: B (not super related but it does evoke the Agatha Christie-esque nature of the book, which I do respect)

Girlfriend on Mars by Deborah Willis

Synopsis: Amber Kivinen is determined to be the first person on Mars. And she will, if she wins the MarsNow reality show competition. When she announces that she’s leaving, her boyfriend Kevin is completely stunned. Whatever happened to just staying in their basement apartment in Vancouver, growing cannabis plants and occasionally picking up gig work to pay the bills? What was so wrong with the life they built together? As Amber travels around the world for week after week of challenges, Kevin vows to stay in their apartment, and not leave until Amber comes back to him.

My thoughts: Readers will know that sometimes I just crave a book about spaceships, and while this didn’t really scratch that itch, I still did enjoy it. It was interesting to contrast the difference between Amber’s perspective about her challenges and pushing her own boundaries and finding new goals, and Kevin’s desire to never change anything, and to like things because they were the same as they’d always been, although I did find Kevin’s parts a bit hard to stomach. Things really came to a head at the ending, and it was surprisingly (unexpectedly) very emotional.

Rating: 3/5 staged drug busts that certainly felt real enough

Title Grade: B (it is indeed about the male main character's girlfriend on Mars, and how she gets there)

Etta and Otto and Russell and James by Emma Hooper

Synopsis: Etta has lived a long life in Gopherlands, Saskatchewan, with her husband Otto, and their neighbour and best friend Russell. But she’s never seen the ocean. So she simply decides that now is the time. And so she begins her 3200 kilometer walk towards the Atlantic Ocean, and there’s simply no one who can change their mind. The farther she walks, the more the lines between memory and reality begin to blur. Sometimes she’s in the prairies, the canadian shield, the maritimes. Other times, she’s back in Gopherlands 60 years ago, when she and Otto and Russell were so young and full of fears about the war. Otto waits patiently back at the farm, learning to follow Etta’s old recipes, and building beautiful sculptures out of papier mache, while Russell is determined to go after Etta (at least until he understands her). And James is happy to be a faithful companion, trailing after Etta.

My thoughts: This is the first of five Canada Reads nominees that I'll be reading this year, and as always, the first book I randomly choose tends to be one of the stronger ones. This was a really moving book. I enjoyed the past storyline (of Etta, Otto, and Russell growing up together in Gopherlands) more than the present storyline of Etta’s walk. But I found both of them to be very moving and emotional, especially with the ending. The author made a specific choice to not use any quotation marks, and it really added to the ambiance and flow of the book. I thought it was an especially good choice because it allowed James to speak without actually talking.

Rating: 4/5 packets of relish and ketchup that might be the difference between life and death

Title Grade: B (Etta and Otto and Russell and James are the four main characters, although it does make me think of a certain song (Chloe and Sam and Sophia and Marcus) that I've only ever listened to once)

I think watches are cool, and in this brief article, I'll tell you about them.

1 – the watch

Everybody knows what a watch is, but do they know how they work? Maybe, anyways:

anatomy

A watch is composed of parts, here they are:

front and back of a watch

movement

The movement is the engine of the watch. It can run on many types of fuel like batteries, solar, movement, or winding.

When it's operated by a battery or solar it's a quartz movement, when it's winding (a spring inside the movement) it's mechanical. Automatic means it's self-winding by a rotor. Some people use mechanical and automatic interchangeably.

complications

A complication in a watch is anything that is extra on top of telling time and is part of the movement. Different markings on the bezel don't count. The most common complications are a chronograph, a date and/or day window. Less common are moon phases, month window, power reserve indicator, world timer and alarms. Those are self-explanatory.

Others like small seconds needs explaining. Basically, the seconds hand has its own tiny sub-dial and rotates in it. You also have more fun complications like GMT — it's an extra hand that tells you the hour of another time zone. Coupled with a rotating bezel, watches with a GMT complication can keep track of 3 time zones at the same time. It's pretty cool. It's my favourite complication right now. There are others, but those are the main ones. There are also different types of each, you can have various flavours of chronographs for example.

design – types of watches

There are many designs for watches, but a lot of them fit the same broad vibe. There is overlap of course. Anyways, here are the main ones, I think:

Diver watches – it's for divers. They're usually bulky, water-resistant for 100s of meters, durable, highly legible and glow in the dark. I like them a lot:

Dress watches – it's for special occasions. Despite the name it also works with suits. They're usually slimmer, simpler, the dials can be more colourful and intricate but overall the watch is going for an understated vibe:

Racing watches – it's for timecels. They usually have a chronograph, small seconds and a tachymètre. The tachymètre is a marking on the bezel allowing you to tell how fast things are going when used with the chronograph:

Pilot watches – you guessed it. They're either highly legible or completely schizo, no in-between:

Field watches – They're for the “field”. More nebulous, basically they're very simple, highly legible and durable. They usually have 24h markings and sometimes a compass bezel:

Novelty – anything goes:

design – uh, other stuff

It's design again. Watches have different shapes, but round is obviously the most common. They also have different sizes, with men's watches being in general bigger than women's. The apparent size of a watch is mostly dictated by the case diameter, and the lug to lug distance (how tall the watch is). But also, thickness can be important.

For the main body of the watch, many materials can be used. For the case, plastic, stainless steel, gold and titanium are common. There are different grades for each material. Other materials are used too, more rarely.

If the bracelet/strap is metal, the material usually follows the case material. Otherwise you can have metal, rubber, textile, leather... bracelets/straps. Honestly, there is a lot of personalisation available with them. There's different clasp mechanisms for each, but they're not exclusive to any material. There are different styles for each as well, like metal has oyster and jubilee bracelets:

Recently, I've been rocking with the nato strap (and I hope it's been rocking with me too.)

For the “crystal”, obviously we don't want to use glass, because it would shatter instantly. Acrylic glass (plexiglass), mineral glass and sapphire glass are most often used. Out of those three, acrylic is the least scratch-resistant, and sapphire the most. But then sapphire is the least shock absorbent out of the three. There's trade-offs for each. This leads us to general care tips.

general care tips

Here are some general care tips:

• modern watches are not super fragile, you don't need to baby them. Obviously don't bang'em hard or drop them from heights. Just don't be careless

• if you're changing the time, date, or winding your watch, take it off your wrist first

• don't change the time/press pushers while you're in the pool or the ocean. the sea is also a no-no

• don't over-wind your watch, if you can't turn the thing anymore, it means you should stop. duh

• there's precise moving metal pieces in watches, they don't like strong magnets

• try not to change the day/date around midnight, it could be strenuous(big word) for the movement. If you have to, do it before 10pm and after 2am.

2 – watch world

There's a whole world around watches, they don't appear out of thin air.

the brands

Just like with everything a couple of brands own everything, but you also have a couple independents that are holding strong:

Don't get too wrapped up in brands, if the watch is good quality and the price is right, it doesn't matter what's written on the dial. Actually, I guess slave labour is not cool so maybe look into the brand a bit.

the people

Since watches can be expensive, it can attract the worst crowd. There are lots of snobs and influencers, therefore the gatekeeping and manufactured hype/hate are there too. There's also a ton of rich people that think that because they can afford expensive watches it makes them connoisseurs. They're wrong.

3 – watches and me

watches and me I guess

When I was a kid I had no money, but I had a dinosaur watch, which is infinitely cooler. In middle/high school I got my parents to buy me a cheap steel watch. In university, I had negative money, but I watched some watch content. My dad who was also a watch enthusiast gifted me watches for some birthdays. (he's still alive but he got a rolex now). Youtube recommended me some watch videos recently and I got back into it. Now I have money, but I also have bills. However I started a second job. I was gonna put all that new money into watches, but my cat got constipated and the vet's expensive.

constipated cat

changing batteries

Most of the watches I own I've had for 5+years. Some even for 10. Almost all are quartz (i.e. they need batteries). Watch batteries die in about 4-5 years depending on the watch. I went to a clock place in late 2021 and I had them all changed, but I guess they gave me shit batteries cause they all died in 2023. At one point I had no functioning watch in my collection.

When I got back into watches this year, I decided I should probably have functioning ones. I wanted to change the batteries myself, cause it's way cheaper.

Opening them up was annoying, but usually once opened it was fine. There is multiple possible mechanism to open/close a watch case. You can have screws, have a screw-in back, or just pressed-on. They can all be kinda tricky. Anyways, now I have working watches.

i had to put something here, I guess

why I think watches are cool

There are so many reasons why watches are cool. What's even cooler, is that the answer to why watches are cool depends on who you ask. There are so many flavours of coolness. Watches are such tiny things and yet have such depth that you have people nerding-out about different aspects. Some are movement nerds, some are design nerds, others are manufacturing nerd, watch history nerd, brand history nerds...

But this is my exposé so I guess you are stuck with what I think makes watches cool.

The fact that watches are made to last not only years, but even decades, in a world where everything's life cycle is getting shorter and shorter, is really cool. Just to think that the watch I'm wearing today could be passed down to my great-grand kids is so cool.

The tech is also really cool, how we use all those teeny-tiny gears and parts, and a simple spring, to make a functioning mini-clock that can even rewind itself is incredible. Some complications like perpetual calendar — where the day, date, month are displayed and never need adjusting (yes, even for leap years) — are also so impressive and cool.

Then they look good. There are so many designs, some classic, some more out there, but a lot of them look cool. You can style it with your clothes, you can have the watch standing out from your outfit — even looking at them on their own is great. From dial, case, bracelet... there is a lot to appreciate visually, and it's cool.

Jacques Cousteau and his trusty black-dialed Doxa

Finally, it's cool to think about watches in the past, as indispensable tools. Before everyone had a tiny computer in their pockets, you could only tell time with a watch, a clock or counting the bells from the church. It is hard to carry a clock around (and even harder to carry a church) so if you were out and about, a watch was your only way of telling time. But at the same time, for some professions, being able to tell time was a life or death thing. You have a secret operation that depends on coordination with your team; better synchronise your watches. You're a pilot an only have fuel for another 40min; you better know when that is. You're a diver and have to decompress for 10min before you're allowed to surface; you need to be able to tell the time if you don't wanna get the bends. Thinking about watches as tools in the olden days is really fascinating. (and cool)

conclusion – random advice

Here are my parting words of wisdom:

• at the end of the day you have to embrace the dings and scratches
• maybe don't buy a ton of cheaper watches instead of a few cool more expensive ones that you will always wear
• remember that watches are meant to last you a lifetime; buy them responsibly. do you see yourself liking that watch in 5, 10, 20 or 50 years?
• ebay is your worst enemy. yes vintage watches are cool and sometime affordable, but do you really need 20?
• be careful with what you like, and what suits you. it doesn't always match up
• getting into watches is a personal journey, don't listen to people. including me. and all of the above

_{“cool” counter:21 most illustrations were shamelessly stolen from the web}

I wrote this guide for a friend looking to transition to UX design. It made me happy to write, so I'll leave it here for those interested. I did not proofread it and I don't care.

User experience (UX) design, put simply, is the act of forming tangible experiences that cause or assist a user to complete a certain action or feel a certain way.

The keyword here is “tangible experiences”: others can design experiences as well, sure, but it is our sole ability and responsibility to translate them to something tangible; to materialize them in front of a player. We do this by holding the player at the center of our work's universe, considering them and their needs as we form systems and interfaces to guide them to their 'physical' – or emotional – destination.

To create a good user experience is a learned skill, inevitably brimming of trial and error. After all, the nature of this kind of work is to begin by making mistakes. These mistakes are tested, these tests produce results, and these results allow us to distill our creations to the point where they execute our intention as perfectly as possible (because in a space like this, perfection is never achievable).

How do you begin thinking like an experience designer? What is design thinking? Unfortunately, it might be impossible to simply transform you into a designer in the short span of a few paragraphs. Still, I can try to help you take the first step.

This Is Probably How You Will Need to Design

Design Thinking / The Experience Goal

Consider something near you. I will consider the eight ounces of to-go drip coffee next to me that I've half finished in the span of thirty minutes. This cup of coffee is not one, but two cups stacked on top of each other, with a plastic lid on top. The coffee is warm.

Why did the barista give me two cups? You might think the answers to be obvious: one cup would be too thin and could potentially burn me; two cups helps insulate the coffee so that it stays warm longer. And yes, these are the only answers; I have no reason to obscure any more from you. But to think of something and break down why it was made the way it is... that is the first step of design thinking. Then we simply reverse it.

In the design process, we start with an objective, an experience goal. We want a cafe patron to be able to comfortably consume their coffee. Simple enough. From there, we consider our user's demographic and their needs.

Consider the User

The average human is simple. They often fail to think before acting; thus, they have the potential to burn themselves on the coffee. But, they don't want to burn themselves!

The average human is also easily irritated. If something they paid for doesn't work out the way they want, there's a high chance they will get upset. Hot coffee cooling down quickly might make them punch a hole in our thin little plaster walls.

Okay, so we've thought about our customer and assumed some things about them. These are not the only traits of a coffee drinker, of course; we don't know everything! We never know everything. If we are unsure of what we might have missed, we can research to discover more factors in our decision-making. We can place a little survey next to the register of the shop, asking our customers how we can improve their experience. We can make user researchers analyze that data and provide us with design directions to follow, because data analysis is not the meat of our job, and we can then make more improvements that soothe those new qualms of our users.

Subsequently, after research, we make some informed design decisions. What if we lined our hot drinks with an additional cup at minimal cost, to ensure customers don't get hurt and sue the shit out of our dinky little third-wave coffee shop? And hey, that second cup would work well to keep our coffee warm for longer! And why not wrap the cups with a little cardboard sleeve, because Janine-53-years-old-who-buys-a-latte-every-two-days said that cup was too damn hot?

Everything I've said above is hopefully not groundbreaking to you at all. I've used all this dramatic and serious language, and you're probably sitting there thinking, “this girl is full of shit, because all the stuff she's pointing out is blatantly obvious”. And that's right! I'm full of shit. However, what might not be as obvious to you is that most people never consciously consider the reasons why something is the way it is, because good design is invisible design. Good design shouldn't make anyone stop and think (undesirable unless intended), because if so, we've slowed down the user or marred their experience (undesirable unless intended), and that makes both user and designer sad. So, if you're sitting there thinking “this is obvious and I already knew it all”, then that probably means we've achieved our purpose. Probably.

User Flow

So we've decided that two cups would help Janine out, and an additional cardboard sleeve would really help Janine out. How do we get these items into Janine's hands, so that she doesn't complain about the temperature of her coffee?

To begin, we try developing a user flow. This is where you, the designer, detail the chain of actions, choices, and expectations you envision the user to execute – via our design – in order to meet our desired experience goal. Creating a user flow takes time and detail-oriented thinking, because the designer must consider every possible state in the process. Where do we start? What can we assume? What are the causes and effects of decisions? What are our expected failure points and how do we resolve them back into our desired course of action?

An example flow for the solutions to our hot coffee dilemma would look something like this:

When a designer puts a user flow together, the chain of events should not be confusing to any random passerby viewing the flow. The final iteration of a user flow, after any review and feedback, should not generate new, relevant what-ifs, because we should be confident that we are accounting for, to the best of our abilities, every relevant possible state, cause, decision, action, and effect.

The Tangible Translation: Wireframes and Mockups

Time for the fun part: transforming plans into real existence! The coffee allegory becomes kinda irrelevant here: in that situation, the plan would simply be something along the lines of:

• increase the regular order of cups
• train baristas to follow expected user flow
• profit

But in the world of digital user experience, we mainly work with screen interfaces. To start, we look at our design decisions and user flow, and we identify:

• main screens
• subcomponents (widgets, panels, etc.)
• states of said screens and subcomponents.

Once these aspects are laid out (you can write a list of them if that helps!), we get to work, translating and aggregating them into wireframes. Wireframes are low-fidelity visual series of mockups of what users could expect to see and interact with in our games or software. They look something like this:

Panels. Buttons. Text. Tabs. But just that. Wireframes present no consideration of visual style. The size of things in a wireframe is not even final. It is tempting to add some kind of visual treatment, especially if you come from an artistic background, but doing so can impede upon the distinction between wireframe and visual mockup. The designer's sole focus here is to present all information to the viewer and user in a way that is simple and sensible. Make their experience of using the software easy.

Note that though there is no visual style applied, certain items have darker and lighter shades or outlines. It is important for our fellow developers to be able to at least slightly understand the difference between a button, a panel, something interactive, and something not. Of course, you can supplement this visual discernment with captions or notes for those who need to reference your work.

In the wireframing process, you should continue to consider end users, but do not forget another crucial set of users: your development compatriots. Who are you showing this to? An engineer who will implement your work? A designer who isn't familiar with how you might lay things out? Try to build your wireframes in ways that align with how they might use or interpret your work.

I've been mentioning users nonstop here. To put it harshly, we user experience designers are simply... vessels of design. While working, we exist and interact with the world solely for the sake of the user experience. Everyone else's thoughts are our priority – though that does not mean you should not consider your own instincts! You are usually also a demographic of the user base. Still, a good designer will be able to separate their biases from the real needs of their users.

Anyways. States. I have given you three frames here, which are all states of the same parent screen. The frames' relationship here is represented by consistent elements among all the frames and the changes in between them. This is important for understanding how the user flow applies between screens and components. For the viewer's convenience, I usually like to provide a key of those components that might change in between screens, and I tend to label major screen states in large text.

This is about as far as I can take you when it comes to wireframe construction guidelines. The intricacies of visual software are things best explained by the countless YouTube tutorials at your fingertips; I highly recommend turning to those for knowledge on auto-layout and prototyping. Good luck!

Presentation and Feedback

Your wireframes are done and ready to be presented? Time for the feedback gauntlet.

Presenting your work to designers and other stakeholders (be it producers, engineers, or anyone, really) is daunting. In a review meeting, the average designer will link their Figma file, screenshare, and walk through every screen/state/design functionality for the audience to comment on and tear apart. Knowledge of your work and the ability to concisely explain it becomes crucial. Some things to keep in mind:

• Always understand the greater narrative of what you are trying to explain. You can easily and accidentally drift into granular detail, but your stakeholders are trying to understand how the feature works.

• More than often, if not every time: your audience will pose questions or mention things that you didn't expect, or maybe forgot to cover in your designs. If that's the case, try not to view this as a failure on your part; instead, think of it more as a new thing to solve collectively.

  • Remember, everything is WIP until it's approved. (Sometimes you can delegate questions to others based on the context! Sometimes you can also pose an idea on the spot and work it through, then mention you'll add that later.)

• Engineers don't hate you. (this is hard to remember in the moment)

• Butting heads with someone? Their feedback is valid, even if you don't think it is at first glance. As a UX designer, your duty is to listen and try to understand where they're coming from before making further statements. Ask them to explain themselves and focus on their reasoning in response to anything they say that seems outlandish. Maybe they actually see something you don't.

• Leave every feedback meeting with an explicit understanding of what to do next. Make changes? Send links to people? Keep track of it all.

That Was Quick

I have only some confidence that I've covered even the majority of what you might need to know as a designer. I don't know if I can handle writing more. The truth is, you – the new designer – will learn a lot of this the hard way, through trial and error, and by getting burned by your mistakes. That's okay! Making mistakes is normal, as we know by now; it's how you respond to them and change your behavior going forward that counts.

Being a designer is wonderfully rewarding. The moment you see people using and enjoying the thing you made, you remember why you did it all; why you almost cried that one night at your computer, why you shook from sheer caffeine intake the other day as you hastily labeled your work for the review in one hour. This thing was once a scant few thoughts in your head, and now it is everyone else's to admire and hate and laugh at and break and use.

We designers are but simple creatures who only want to make useful, beautiful, delightful things for others to use. We dream to make people's lives easier, to help them have fun, to make them feel. It is easy to forget in the forest of everyday labor why we committed to creative work in the first place... but without this, what else do we have? What could be greater than the joy of creation? Are we anything without that which we love the most?

No. We are not. Now go forth and become a workaholic.

December

This month I read 5 ebooks and 1 eaudiobook and 6 physical books from the Toronto Public Library, totaling to 10 books.

We Solve Murders by Richard Osman

Synopsis: Steve Wheeler’s world is small, but he likes it that way. He has a good routine going; he goes to the pub quiz, he sits on his favourite bench, he does a bit of low-stakes investigative work, and he chats with his daughter-in-law Amy. Amy Wheeler prefers life with a bit more adrenaline. She works for a private security firm, and she’s currently stationed on a private island, protecting the famous author Rosie D’Antonio (she’s not a day over 70). Rosie makes for excellent company, which is good because this job isn’t particularly interesting. That is, until the other security agent assigned to the detail attempts to kill Amy. Suddenly, she’s forced on the run (with Rosie and all of Rosie’s luggage), and it turns out that there’s a trail of bodies that all appear to lead to Amy. And when her boss at the private security firm goes dark, Amy’s forced to turn to the only person she can trust to solve this mystery: her father-in-law Steve.

My thoughts: When I heard that Richard Osman was pivoting away from his Thusday Murder Club series in order to start a new project, I was a little worried. But it turns out I had nothing to worry about. This has the same dry writing style that I adore from The Thursday Murder Club series, and although the characters aren’t quite as charming as a group of seniors, I still loved every minute of it. Readers will know that I’m not a fan of private investigators in crime fiction, but Steve and Amy together were both so competent that it was never an issue for me. It also had a really poignant message about grief, which is part of what makes these novels so much deeper and more enjoyable than your average crime novel. I can’t wait for whatever Osman releases next.

Rating: 5/5 marriage bets that you are waiting to cash in on (for love)

Bad Men by Julie Mae Cohen

Synopsis: Saffy Huntley-Oliver is a socialite with a secret. No, it’s not that she’s having an affair, or that she’s addicted to drugs. It’s that for years, she’s been hunting and killing so-called “bad men;” rapists, abusers, corrupt politicians, and even her own step father (a child molester). And it’s made her pretty cynical about men in general; they all have secrets that make them bad men. Perhaps the only exception to that is Jonathan Desrosiers. He’s a beloved true crime podcaster that covers the cold cases, and his research actually helped solve a murder. Saffy can’t help it; she’s in love. Jonathan’s life is crumbling around him; his wife left him because he only ever focused on the podcast, and the next day a body is left on his doorstep, making him the prime suspect. He’s utterly miserable, but for Saffy, it’s the perfect opportunity. She engineers a couple of meet cutes with him, and suggests that the best way for Jonathan to clear his name is to solve the crime. Reluctantly, he agrees. Will Jonathan finally be able to prove his innocence? And, more importantly, will Saffy finally find the man of her dreams?

My Thoughts: I think this book would have been a disaster if it took itself very seriously. It billed itself as a feminist thriller, but I felt that the feminism was extremely surface level: an upper class white woman killing men that were abusing or harming other women. It wasn’t intersectional, and seemed a bit like a caricature of feminism. However, Saffy’s storyline was very fun and didn’t really take itself seriously, which made it work. It was especially funny to contrast Jonathan (completely stressed out because someone is stalking and poisoning his ex-wife, and he’s the main suspect) and Saffy (suspicious because she thinks that Jonathan is still in love with his ex-wife), but while still giving Saffy a lot of agency and importance even though her stakes were much lower.

Rating: 3/5 latex catsuits that are actually excellent forensic countermeasures

The Outlier by Elisabeth Eaves

Synopsis: Cate Winter is probably the most successful neuroscience ever. She and her team have developed a revolutionary treatment for Alzheimer's Disease, and her biotech company is about to be acquired for millions of dollars. You’d never suspect her darkest secret: that she’s a diagnosed psychopath. After a mysterious fire that killed her family, Cate was sent to the Cleckley Institute, an institution dedicated to the study and rehabilitation of child psychopaths. For Cate, it was a good childhood. She considered Dr M, the institute’s founder, as a surrogate father figure, and as an adult she’s become wildly successful. But Cate was an outlier among her classmates; by age 30, they had all been jailed, killed, or barely managing to earn a living. All except for Cate, and one other student. Armed with the knowledge that she’s not the only outlier, Cate becomes obsessed with finding him. But what happens if she’s finally met her match?

My thoughts: I think this book had an interesting premise, but overall was not very interesting. The other outlier (Hunter) eventually was revealed to be almost cartoonishly villainous. He literally had a tropical lair straight out of a James Bond novel, and his big invention had a water intake pump that doubled as a fish killing machine, which is how he eventually got caught. Hunter didn’t even have any issues with the fish, he just couldn’t be bothered to put in a grate or redesign the intake, or literally anything else.

Rating: 2/5 politicians that are promising to light up the night if they are elected

Emily Wilde’s Map of the Otherlands by Heather Fawcett (Emily Wilde #2)

Synopsis: After the success of her Encyclopaedia of Faeries, Emily Wilde is comfortable at Cambridge University. She’s currently working on her new project, a map-book of the faerie realms, and enjoying life with her co-author (and possible fiance) Wendell Bambleby. However, things might just collapse when her colleague Farris Rose accuses Wendell of violating academic integrity principles during the creation of her encyclopaedia. While it’s true that Wendell is actually a faerie and had indeed committed such violations for other scholarly works, there were absolutely zero violations in the creation of Emily’s encyclopaedia. Rose threatens to reveal his suspicions to Cambridge itself, which would be a disaster for Emily’s career. At the same time, Wendell is under threat. His faerie step-mother has sent assassins after him (and did manage to poison him), and he’s clearly no longer safe at Cambridge. The only solution is for the three of them (plus Emily’s niece Ariadne) to immediately travel to the Austrian alps. That way, Wendell can outrun his assassins, Emily can research her map-book and hopefully find a door to Wendell’s realm to find a cure for this poison, and Rose can supervise everything to make sure there’s no impropriety. But the Austrian Alps are inhospitable at the best of times, and especially during winter, surrounded by malicious folk. Will Emily and her crew survive the winter? And will they manage to rescue an esteemed researcher?

My Thoughts: My controversial opinion is that I don’t really like this series, even though everyone seems to rave about it. I listened to it as an audiobook and I did not like the narrator, but beyond that it just didn’t feel like a great book. It wasn’t necessarily bad, but it was definitely lacking something that I couldn’t quite put my finger on, and I didn’t find it particularly interesting. I’m also not a huge Emily x Wendell stan, so I wasn’t really impressed by the progression of their relationship in this book. I only read this sequel out of obligation to the first book, but I won’t be reading anything more in this series. I’m also annoyed that the book isn’t called “Emily Wilde’s Atlas of the Otherlands” because she’s working on a book of maps (aka an atlas), and not just a single map. The one thing that I did like was the Danielle de Grey storyline that continued from the previous book. However, the main charm of that storyline was when Emily detailed de Grey’s insane adventures in the footnotes of her diary, and that charm was lost when de Grey became a full character.

Rating: 3/5 tents that blend in perfectly into the surrounding grassy hillsides

The Queen’s Gambit by Walter Tevis

Synopsis: After her parents were killed in a car crash, eight-year-old Beth Harmon was sent to an orphanage. After weeks of observing the janitor play chess, he begrudgingly allowed her to play. It soon became obvious that Beth had more than just a knack for chess; she was one of the best players in Kentucky, if not the whole country. After her adoption, Beth started entering chess tournaments around the country and internationally, eventually supporting her adoptive mother. Throughout the novel, Beth struggles with her addiction to tranquilizers (which was caused by the orphanage staff intentionally drugging all of their charges), and her inability to connect with anyone or anything that is not chess.

My thoughts: I’ll be honest, this was not the kind of book that I like. I only read it because I was looking for a book to satisfy the last category for the 2024 TPL Reading Challenge (A book about games), and because I was getting served a lot of short-form video content about The Queen’s Gambit Netflix show (I’ve never seen it, but I figured if the show was so popular, it couldn’t be that bad). My advice to readers: don’t ever do that! As soon as I started reading it I knew it wasn’t for me, but it was too late to back out. I don’t think that I can declare it to be a bad book, but it was just not enjoyable to read. The whole tone of the book is incredibly dour and grey, and all of the characters’ interactions are mechanical (instead of emotional).

Rating: 2/5 Heists of the century (breaking into the orphanage head office and stealing 200 tranquilizer pills)

Full Speed to a Crash Landing by Beth Revis (Chaotic Orbits #1)

Synopsis: Ada Lamarr is out of options. Her spaceship has a massive hole in the side, and her oxygen tank is rapidly running dry. Unfortunately, her only hope of rescue is a government-run salvage ship, who are very reluctant to have her on board. They’re here on a classified mission to recover some high-value objects, and they certainly don’t want a loose cannon and illegal salvager like Ada to interfere with things. And Ada is fine with that. She’s more than happy to enjoy the abundant rations and luxurious (in comparison) accommodations on board, and to flirt shamelessly with Rian White, the government-representative in charge of the mission. But Ada and Rian each have secrets to hide, and it remains to be seen who is really manipulating whom.

My Thoughts: This was a short but fun sci fi novella. Readers will know that I’ve been hankering for a science fiction book that’s about science and spaceships (and not a fantasy or a war epic), and this really scratched the itch for me. I thought there was enough meat to the story that the author could have extended it into a full novel, so I’m glad that a sequel novella has been released. My most major complaint was that the name of the main character felt too obvious of a reference to two famous women in computer science (Ada Lovelace and Hedy Lamarr). They both definitely deserve to be memorialized, but it just felt like I was being smacked in the face (especially because it stuck out compared to all of the other character names).

Rating: 4/5 notoriously reliable jetpack booster engines that just happened to fritz out when you were at the bottom of a tall, tall cliff

The Power by Naomi Alderman

Synopsis: This work of narrative nonfiction attempts to chronicle the initial discovery and effects of the ritual power: the ability for women (first teenage girls, and then spreading to older women) to generate electrical shocks from their bodies. It follows four major figures; Roxy, the daughter of a gangster who takes over her father’s empire; Allie, who runs away from her abusive foster parents and accidentally starts a cult; and Margo, mayor of an American city who slowly rises through the ranks. The fourth character is the only man: Tunde, a Nigerian journalist who allegedly recorded accounts of women’s rises to power around the world (it is common knowledge that Tunde’s body of work was actually written and published by his friend and coworker Nina). It is an engaging but ultimately implausible version of events.

My thoughts: I tried to write my synopsis in the style of the prologue and epilogue of the book, which consists of Neil proposing his book concept to Naomi. After reading, Naomi comments that the book is “cute but unrealistic” for depicting a patriarchal society, and suggests that Neil publish under a woman’s name so that he is taken more seriously. In reality, I think this is a great book that is worth the hype, and it explores the concept of rape culture and the overall patriarchy by flipping the script and giving women the power to painfully shock anyone. I loved the alternate history aspect of it, and it reminds me how much I like epistolary-style books, where you have to figure out what’s going on from the letters, reports, and other messages exchanged between characters. I thought that Alderman pulled off the concept really well. In the moment, I was irrationally disappointed that the female characters were complex and often immoral, but I definitely think the book is better for it. A small detail that I really appreciated was that the tissues that generate the electricity in women are called Skeins (which is the name for a bundle of yarn or string, and fibre arts are often portrayed as women’s work).

4/5 packs of glitter smuggled through Eastern Europe on order to support the troops

Chosen Ones by Veronica Roth

Synopsis: Sloane, Matt, Ines, Albie, and Esther were the chosen ones. As teenagers, they used a collection of folklore artifacts and uncontrollable powers to save North America from the catastrophic disasters wrought by the Dark One. But that was 10 years ago. Now, they all cope in different ways, but none of them are really doing well. At the 10th Anniversary ceremony commemorating the defeat of the Dark One, Sloane, Matt and Esther are captured. They wake up in an alternate dimension of Earth. In this universe, magic is everywhere, but so are threats. The Dark One is still active, and the leadership of this alternate Earth have a proposal: if Matt, Sloane, and Esther defeat the Dark One for good, then they can go back to their Earth. Esther and Matt agree, but Sloane is unable to master the magic. More than that, she’s tired of being used.

My thoughts: I thought that this was a cool concept for a book, and the first two thirds were done very well. However, Roth really lost the plot for the last third of the book. I thought it was absolutely insane that the main villain’s justification for constantly destroying the world was because he was immortal and wanted to die. Besides being insane, she didn’t really flesh out the main villain enough, but rather dropped everything in at the end. I’m also bothered that she completely sidelined Ines’s character. Why bother writing in 5 teenagers who saved the world if you’re only ever going to discuss four of them?

Rating: 4/5 origami paper cranes from a deceased loved one that weren’t necessarily acquired legally

A Holly Jolly Diwali by Sonia Lalli

Synopsis: Niki Randhawa has always made the practical choice, especially because her sister Jasmine was always the wild card who was breaking their parent’s heart. But being practical isn’t easy; in order to build her career in data analytics she’s been worked to the bone, with no time to make friends or visit relatives in India. But when she suddenly gets laid off from her job, it forces her to make other plans. So, she flies to India to attend her best friend Diya’s wedding. While there, she meets a very interesting guy, Sam, and starts getting in touch with her Indian roots. But Niki and Sam live oceans apart. Could they ever make it work?

My thoughts: This was a pretty standard romance novel, and I wouldn’t say that any part of it stood out to me. I was specifically hoping that this book would be an alternative to the huge influx of Christmas novels, since it was a book about Diwali, but Diwali was barely in the book at all (despite the title). I understand that it made sense for Niki not to know a lot about the history of Diwali and thus have to ask around about its significance (especially for Sikhs), but it felt like way too much telling and not enough showing.

Rating: 3/5 group honeymoons to the most gorgeous beaches you’ve ever seen

The Matzah Ball by Jean Meltzer

Synopsis: Rachel Rubenstein-Goldblatt has two big secrets. Firstly, she has myalgic encephalomyelitis, aka chronic fatigue syndrome. And secondly, she (a good Jewish daughter) has made a career of writing Christmas Romance novels. What can you do? The girl just loves Christmas. But when she meets with her publishers, she’s handed a major problem: they don’t want any more Christmas novels. What they do want is a Hanukkah novel, but Rachel hates Hanukkah. Well, she doesn’t hate it, but it just doesn’t have the same magic and charm of Christmas. So the only way that she’ll ever get inspired to write her next novel (and keep her job) is if she can get tickets to the hottest Hanukkah event in New York: the Matzah Ball. She even has an in with the event planner (Jacob Greenberg), because they went to Jewish summer camp together (we’ll skip over the part where he broke her heart). But the only tickets left are for volunteers, meaning that Rachel will have to work for 7 days in order to earn her place at the ball. Will she be able to balance her chronic illness with her assignment? And how can she deal with her unrequited feelings for Jacob after all these years?

My thoughts: I’ve previously read another Jewish romance by this author (Kissing Kosher), and I have to say that I didn’t like The Matzah Ball as much. I wish that Rachel’s CFS had been more of a focal point for the book. In Kissing Kosher, the main character didn’t cure her chronic illness, but she learned how to cope a lot better, and that’s what I was hoping to see again. This time, the chronic illness was not nearly as prominent, and I think the book was a bit less interesting for it. Also, I hated how much Rachel was obsessed with Christmas. The scene where she spent $60 (that she can’t afford) to visit a mall Santa Claus for a makeshift therapy session (that the mall Santa despises), made me almost stop reading the book.

Rating: 3/5 giant menorahs that were delivered with much assembly required

Thyme Travellers: An Anthology of Palestinian Speculative Fiction, edited by Sonia Sulaiman

Synopsis: This is a collection of 14 short stories written by authors from across the Palestinian diaspora. It includes stories about two women digging a tunnel from Australia to Palestine, a father and son in Ottawa who struggle to communicate with each other without the help of AI scripts, an outcast grandson struggles what to do with his grandmother’s memory chips, and more.

My thoughts: I thought this was a great collection, with a really wide variety of stories, both in style and in content. Some were extremely metaphorical, while others were much more concrete; some were set in the present or near present, others were in the very far future or even alternate realities, etc, and I appreciated the variety. It’s also interesting to note that the head editor started this project several years before the war in Gaza began, and the conclusion of the book includes a few calls to action for the readers to take (they primarily involve sharing and uplifting Palestinian voices). Rating: 3/5 alternate realities, where you either stayed with the love of your life, or you married your husband

Lavash at First Sight by Taleen Voskuni

Synopsis: Nazeli “Ellie” Gregorian is so busy with her tech sector marketing job that she barely has time for her lackluster boyfriend, let alone her family's business, Hagop’s Fine Armenian Foods. So when he dumps her, it doesn’t hurt too much. The real issue is that her parents have asked Nazeli to come with them to PakCon, a national food packaging conference in Chicago at the same time as her job is demanding her to be available 24/7 to work on an incredibly important project. The truth is that Hagop’s Fine Armenian Foods is struggling, and this conference could be their last shot at rescuing the business. But there’s a once in a lifetime opportunity: PakCon is hosting a game-show style competition, and the winning business will get an ad spot at the Super Bowl. Nazeli is determined to win, even when she meets the gorgeous Vanya, who just so happens to be at PakCon with her own Armenian food family business, and therefore becomes her biggest competitor. Will Nazeli be able to juggle the expectations of her job, her parents, and the cute girl at the next booth? Or will it all come crashing down?

My thoughts: I thought this was a pretty decent romance book. I read Sorry, Bro (see my July 2023 roundup) by the same author, and this was definitely done in a similar vein, just with the added layer of a cooking competition. I was a little bit annoyed that I saw the third act conflict coming from a mile away (what else could possibly happen when there are cameras everywhere and Nazeli has eaten Vanya’s family’s food before and disliked it, while simultaneous pretending to Vanya that she’s never tried it before??). However, I liked the added layers of Nazeli trying to please her parents (who weren’t caricatures), and the complicated dynamic between her family and Vanya’s family.

Rating: 3/5 hot-ones style competitions with hot sauce so spicy it might kill your father (or your crush’s father).